Anita B NDE

Experience Description

I was strapped onto a T-Bar in the surgery prepping me. There were lots of monitors going off, causing a lot of distress among the nursing and medical personnel who were there.

I was strapped in, when a voice came into my head as I think I was losing consciousness. It said, 'This is when I leave, this is when I die.' As I felt this, I looked up to the ceiling and there appeared many faces but I did not recognized anyone I knew. All these people were 4 to 5 people deep. The love, kindness, and compassion that came from all of them to me was so beautiful and overwhelming. In this love, I felt myself being drawn to them like this was the true home of this one; the great unconditional love that bathed me in its kindness. At the same time, the sounds of the surgery room were becoming less and less. All physical experiences of the body were moving to the very thin periphery of my consciousness.

I had awareness that there was a thread from about the mid-lumbar area back down to my body. It was dragging me slightly in my move upwards to these loving souls. As I moved further towards them all sounds of the struggle below in the surgery room and the experience of the thread becoming thinner and thinner were being replaced with magnetic attraction to the very bosom of love that all these faces were projecting.

Then some awareness came that I knew where all this was heading. I was shocked as I had just given birth to twin girls and had consciously willed them on to this earth. I couldn’t leave them now. It was my duty to care and raise them.

I noticed a male face in this crowd and he seemed to have more status or substantiality to him. He had blond, thick hair with curls, a blonde, thick beard and the brightest, most loving eyes. He had a chunky, huggable body from what I was aware of from his waist and up.

I appealed to him telepathically, looking directly into his eyes. There was this profound love enveloping me and so attractive and magnetic that seemed to resonate with the very fabric of the universe. I couldn’t come with them yet. I dearly would go any other time when the girls were grown. I look forward to seeing him and them all again, but I MUST remain on the earth now. I had great sadness in making this decision but knew it was the right path.

This large, gentle loving man gave me the slightest of acknowledgement with his smiling warm eyes. I immediately felt myself descending gently back to body below. I heard all of the noises again - in the machines and urgent chatter within the operating theater.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: August 20, 1993

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Childbirth. Large undetected bleed at birth of twins in busy birthing hospital. When discovered, I was already in rigors, and raced to surgery. When prepped for surgery is when it happened

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes. Not directly. My focus and awareness was attracted to the overwhelming love and compassion showering down on me from all those faces. I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. There were no real sensations or experiences of body or mind, just unbounded, loving awareness

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Consciousness and alertness were highly evident, strong, and clear throughout the experience. It was body awareness that changed

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Only present unbounded timelessness. Beingness without separation.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Vision prior to the experience was confounded with mind chatter and drama. During the experience the whole vision field seemed to switch into a different vibration or more subtle with an intensity and purity like outside the usual visual field, but maybe clearer due to no mind.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Hearing was usual during the lead up to being strapped on the operating couch and as the ascent began it changed again all human bound sounds faded and then sound was not separate from visual and unbounded awareness. All was permeated in love.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain There was something coming from this crowd of faces but the whole experience could not be separated into visual, emotional or aural. I felt unbounded joy and love.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Ecstatic and deep uninterrupted all engrossing love, kindness and compassion

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life. I had just given birth to twins a few hours before and knew part of this journey was to raise these beings.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Other faiths- New age. Long history of Kundalini and psychic phenomena experiences arising spontaneously from age 16. Then later aged 20, full study into traditional Yogic internal practices within a traditional lineage

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain Some time on from this time I stumbled or was led to non-duality where I had the profound experience of mind disappearing altogether for some time dropping the veil between the individual self and the universal consciousness This has never left now but even though the mind returned, it is just in a weaker or lesser role.

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths Non-duality (Advaita Vedanta)

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience It was my first real encounter with the reality of how transient the body/ person is. There is a profound untouched stillness that can be unembodied. I had had deep meditation experiences to this and third eye non brain experiences fleetingly but all within a body. This experience had no precedent in any of my previous experiences even though I had had a lifetime of glimpses into another way to experience living.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes We/life/consciousness goes on is continuous and only inhabits the now

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin It was when this voice in my head said this is when I leave, this is when I die. Then all of these beings being present especially the one that may be called Jesus or maybe not. I have never had any Christian upbringing or exposure.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain Maybe Jesus as a dark blonde headed and bearded blue eyed living soul.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes I experienced direct unembodied awareness. Body was not necessary to experience

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes The experience of nothing but love permeating all awareness annd experience and including apparent unearthly beings.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes Yes amongst the beings, all of human appearance, waiting for me there was one Male as described above, who appeared to hold some attraction or fullness or authority than the others. I became aware that this being may have been a representation of ‘god’ but that was only later. I just felt the magnetic pull to ask him for putting this off until my children were grown which he was able to grant me

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Body and this human exper is so flimsy and transparent

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I was aware of pure awareness itself that was separating off the physical body and those body experiences were disappearing. I was aware of a loving realm drawing back to itself. A sense of comfort by home A feeling of pure untouched awareness and unencumbered freedom. End of suffering. Pure divine love immersion on

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes That the self or awareness is continuous and untouched by bodily experience, never can be truly harmed or stopped by the bodily experience I became totally unafraid of the passing of mine or anyone else’s body.

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes All was love, kindness and compassion much greater than anything experienced before or after.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life More and greater unfolding of direct experiences that lead me to the direct lived knowledge/awareness of continuous uninterrupted unbounded awareness through remarkable sequences of events

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? I don't identify with my story as strongly as I used to. My opinions and beliefs or those of other people I don't take too seriously now. I’m less reactive and more relish and revel in the direct experience of living. Yes

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience The very strange thing is I don’t recall when I recalled this experience within my memory banks. I just know that I experienced must have been at the time of giving birth I just can’t recall when I remembered it.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I can read and see through people mire certainly. I have heard the continuous heavenly sound or note. Was evident in the background

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The body and this apparent life is a dance a mirage a role on a stage that comes and goes where the key actor or awareness never changes

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I can’t recall when I remembered it. I have shared it for at least maybe 10 or 15 years but can’t be certain

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real Direct pure experience that profoundly changed my whole attitude to living and time.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was dramatic in the way it shifted my sense of me and this reality. It gave me great confidence in living a brave and adventurous life.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes When a profound awakening into unbroken unbounded awareness where there was no awareness even if the body slept. This happens about 30 years later.

e3xyqmf_nde