Anna L NDE

Experience Description

I lost my sensory connection with my surroundings. I felt as if my body were shrinking, losing each extremity one by one (fingers, hands and feet, arms, legs etc.), until my body was reduced to nothing and all that remained was my consciousness. At the beginning, I felt upset at losing my beautiful and precious body (this was the first time in my life that I thought of it as 'beautiful and precious.') I became aware that somehow Light itself was calling to me. Then I found myself submerged in something, which seemed like a warm and welcoming sea, black and dark, where there was no sound.

I wondered why I saw no one else there. As I lifted my eyes, I found myself gazing at a Light, which shone from beyond the sea in which I was submerged. The Light resembled nothing I had ever seen, it was huge, and I would even say infinite. Like a sun above the sea, it gleamed with every color. I could feel its warmth. It seemed to have its own life, its own consciousness, and its own movement, and it seemed to be aware of me and to be communicating with me telepathically. I perceived the Light above the water as being part and parcel of 'my' Light (that is to say, myself).

The surface of the water was like a wall, which 'separated' us from each other, although we were the same thing. Gazing at the Light, I was filled with energy, and my only thought was to reach it. I moved as fast as I could, but I collided with something – an elastic wall of water. I then started using all my strength to break through that wall of water. I wanted only to reach the Light. Nothing else had any meaning and I was thinking to myself, 'No stupid wall is going to stop me from reaching my Light!'

At the same time, something was calling me back – someone was feeling fearful emotions. I didn't realize that these feelings were coming from me, from my own human feelings of attachment. The light informed me that, in fact, the fear and the attachment to the world were mine. I ignored those feelings and went on pressing against the wall of water so I could merge with the Light, which now appeared formless. I longed to enter its embrace and finally did so! In the communication that followed, I had the feeling that we were good friends, the Light and I, and that we had known each other always and been through many things together. The struggle with my human emotions ceased, everything was calm. I had a fleeting vision of minor but problematic conflicts, during which the Light taught me to avoid harming others. The light asked me to explore my current feelings. Was I afraid? Was I OK now? What things did I wish for? How was I feeling? In the end, I decided I was really happy to return to the Earth to make good the hurt that I had caused. As I decided this, I felt myself being called back here again. I did not resist. I felt a peaceful resignation, a kind of 'Damn it, these human limitations don't appeal much to me, but this is something I have to do'.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: Marzo 23 de 2011

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain shock causado por droga Other Tratamiento mal realizado con antipsicóticos. I was in shock from wrongly administered drugs.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? At the moment of losing my physical body

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning There was no time. The Light and I seemed to be in a dimension with different physical laws. The water was overhead and did not fall, and did not impede our movement.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Everything was visible at once, as if I had eyes all around, like insects do.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. In that place I heard no sounds, it was silent, and communication was telepathic.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain It felt like being immersed in a dark sea, before looking upwards to see, on the other side of the water's surface, a guiding light.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Uncertain There was no one there besides myself, but the Light was a Being, in itself. From time to time, it assumed a human face, one that I did not know which had no name. It contained me within itself. It knew me and I had the feeling that, from forever, we had been the best of friends, and we had been through many adventures together. The feeling was that we had often had these kinds of chats that are typical of intimate friends. It questioned me about my physical and emotional sensations, and about my thoughts and desires.

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It felt like being immersed in a dark sea, before looking upwards to see, on the other side of the water's surface, a guiding light.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Joy, happiness, peace, euphoria, love.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I learned that I must respect others and do them no harm. I only had memories of a couple of childhood and adolescent traumas.

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future

The experience included: Boundary

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes The Light and myself were separated at first by the surface of the dark sea. It was a kind of wall of water, which I was trying to penetrate with all my strength. I had a strong desire to get to the Light. I got through the elastic wall of water, and the light and I embraced each other. There we had a short 'conversation' before turning around. I had a strong desire to come back to see if I could make good the errors and the harm I had done to someone. I had the feeling that this 'someone' I was harming was Existence itself and I had to start to make amends.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal 'Creencia de que Dios es la Fuente de todas las cosas y está en todas ellas, limitándose simplemente a Ser, Pero no interviene en nada de lo que ocurre en nuestra vida.'

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I had learned previously that we are the All. I had understood this, but it was difficult to do so. Now I understand it better.

What is your religion now? Liberal 'Creencia de que Dios es la Fuente de todas las cosas y está en todas ellas, y es perfectamente capaz de intervenir en las circunstancias de su propia Creación.'

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I had learned previously that we are the All. I had understood this, but it was difficult to do so. Now I understand it better.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I was taught that instead of doing harm, I must heal

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I feel more awareness of respect for others and of their existence as being an important piece in the puzzle.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes It's difficult to explain the exact appearance of everything, as there is no point of comparison with anything physical of this world.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Sometimes I am conscious of the amorphous presence of the Light. I do not perceive it with my senses, but I know it is there, as if observing me throughout my life.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I felt great love and a great joy when I first had the desire to return to the world.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Uncertain I shared it in a forum of writers as if it were a short story, and so that is how it was received, like a kind of 'birth memory'. Close relatives took it as a necessary piece of knowledge.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain I had heard talk about NDEs, but had no details, and did not relate NDE cases with what had happened to me, until I saw a documentary on the subject.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real At first I took it to be the effect of the trauma and had no clear notion of the nature of the event, whether a birth memory or a kind of astral travel. But I was conscious of having spoken with the being I learned to call 'my best friend'.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably real On checking other people's accounts, and having a kind of memory of what happened. I believe it probable that this is something which happens to people. The amount of information I gathered leaves me still in doubt as to whether it was something 'supernatural' or if it was a product of my own brain.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes On coming across information about NDEs, I remembered, thinking: 'Yes! This is what I went through!'

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Being drawn into this experience is like taking part in a sort of video tape, being rewound from the moment of shock. Losing my body was the inverse process to gestation and birth: extremities, organs and cells joining and becoming one, vanishing again into the womb. And into the Light. The Light was a friend, not a judge, nor a father or any such thing. I believe it has always been there, it is, and will remain, our friend.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Ask about the presence and appearance of symbols, as well as persons such as animals or abstract figures that occur in some cases.