April G Probable NDE

Experience Description

We had lost my beloved uncle Dan, in February 2016 after his year-long battle with Stage-4 pancreatic cancer; it would take too long to describe our history, but even as a step-uncle who was only 5 years older than me, he was dear to me from the start. I was 6 when we met, he 11 yrs old. For perspective, Dan was just past his 50th birthday when he died.

Shortly after Dan died, my daughter got pregnant by a young man named T, who was addicted to opiates. What truly hurt was his mother KNEW and did not get him help for this while he was a minor. My husband and I ensured our daughter stayed alive, well and healthy after T accidentally overdosed in May 2016. We took custody and guardianship of the baby to prevent T's mom from trying to obtain legal custody-solely because she wanted to take T's entire estate from his legal heir. On top of the legal expenses to fight all this, I was falsely accused of a violent pedophile attack by someone online because I didn't agree with his political opinion. My life spiraled out of control at this point after fighting these allegations for almost a year. While I will not divulge the full circumstance here, on August 10th 2019 I tried to commit suicide after thinking I had ruined my marriage of 13 years.

I had a lot to drink this evening. I had been fighting to keep my head above water since mid-2015. While my granddaughter was the brightest blessing I could ask for, my life circumstances were bad. My husband and I had hit rock bottom. He had just walked out of our finished basement. I had been wearing my step-uncle's pancreatic bracelet and I yanked it off, thinking he'd be ashamed of me. I wanted to die and I felt unworthy to wear it. I swallowed a lot of pills, washing them down with more alcohol. I did this out in the backyard at night. It was warm and I know I at least passed out.

I closed my eyes and saw a gray, cloudy-looking background. I clearly remember Danny standing in front of me laughing, like we were sharing a good joke. He said, 'Can you make yourself throw up?' I was so happy to see him! I was relaxed, happy and I laughed back at him saying, 'Of course I can. It's easy - watch!'

I don't remember vomiting. I vaguely remember leaving the lawn chair I sat in and stumbling back into the house where I slept for 12 hours. Luckily, I had no real adverse effects from the overdose.

I will also mention that my husband had also independently decided he was done with this life and went into the garage to commit suicide by shotgun. He loaded it, pulled the trigger and only got a click. The shotgun shell has a mark where the hammer hit it but did not discharge.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 8/10/2019

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt Other: Unsure, but I believe I succeeded in dying.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I knew Dan was passed yet he was vibrant and 'alive'

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? After overdosing

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning No meaning

Were your senses More vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was like a dark cloud was behind Dan but he was clear, happy and bright. I knew he was gone on Earth but so ALIVE regardless

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There was no sound. We didn't communicate via talking but through emotion and thoughts.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My deceased uncle Dan. Also, I have sat at both the right and left hand sides of God-depending on His need. On His right, I was His messenger and did His work; on His left, He held me as His child. Amazing.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It was dark-cloudy behind Dan. The other times I sat on either side of God, it was bright-cloudy.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Loved. The suicide attempt was 'silly'...there was more to come, Dan would be with me and we'd get through it together even though it wouldn't feel like he was there all the time.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will After Dan asking me if I could voluntarily vomit the pills and I said yes, I 'woke up'

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Other or several faiths *I AM* -religion is unimportant, only God is

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths *I AM* -religion is unimportant, only God is

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience Having been 'in touch' with loved ones as they died, I knew they moved on and this is not the end

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes In actual dreams I have sat at both the left hand and right hand sides of God; the right as He told me what purpose I was going to be used for; the left hand, He held me as a father would and the feeling is indescribable. Unconditional love is the closest it can be put into words.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists. Even though I stood in gray mist, I was feeling content and at peace. Dan coming to help me with a 'this is just silly stuff!' attitude, no judgement.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Dan was all love, no judgement.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes My husband and I have reconciled

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I can't express the purity of emotion and love

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. I was aware that Dan was dead when I met him in this space.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes The next day, with my husband. Because I have exhibited prior spiritual abilities that he could verify, he believed me.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes See above, sitting with God