Arlene A Probable NDE

Experience Description

First just to mention above check box of OBE - I would not say it was an OBE but more an extension of own being to this encounter.... perhaps describable by a surgeon's scalpel becoming a part of him when in theatre; almost like not letting go between the encounter, holding on with an imaginary hand?

I cannot explain it other than to say it started off slowly and hazy; and gradually cleared up to crystal clear clarity but stayed gradual or 'stuck' in time, very difficult to explain. Once the haze had cleared the light was extremely bright and white but not hurtful to my eyes and definitely not the sun kind of light where it is or would be warm or scalding in this case. It felt like I had enhanced sight and was very astute to my surroundings. There was no climate pertaining to weather. Once clear It was instant that the light mentioned surrounded what I now fondly call my 'morph'..... This is my own way of embracing her with humour.

She stood in front of me in the light. It felt like I was looking through a camera lens as that is the extent of the 'picture' or encounter. It is all within a range of around 15 meters from me, maximum. I am inside an enclosure (possibly 'the tunnel') but no beginning, no end, no sides nor roof or floor! Yet I know that there is something above, below, behind and to my left and right; surrounding me. I am however not touching the ground but it is there. Beyond my morph is not visible as the light surrounds her totally.

She has on a white blouse, not fancy, not a T-shirt but a casual blouse but it is distinct white even with the surrounding white light. She is clouded or hazed waist down. She is between 18 and 25 years old, maybe younger? Not older! I call her my morph because she resembles 2, possibly 3 people morphed into one. So, we will call 'them' by name of who they look like. She is bigger than me (45kg) but smaller than my Personal Admin Manager (Ellenor) who is quite hefty (100 to 120kg), she is approximately the size of my best friend who I fondly call Sissy as she has been in my life since she was 12 and is now 39 (about 70kg). She could be 80kg to be more exact. She has a bob hairstyle with a fringe that is cut just above her eyebrows, it is dark brown to black but very shiny or in good condition. If I took Ellenor's face and my own and morphed them into one and added my Sissy's freckles she had when younger this is what she looks like, only the younger version. Her skin tone is pale but not sickly pale in complexion. I do plan to ask my aunt to show me as many photos as possible of my family in their younger years but she did not remind me of anyone I knew in the past or current (besides as mentioned).

I was totally calm; at peace; pain, suffering and discomfort free; no longer weary; unafraid and amused (at my morph). The whole event was not within earthly time but in fact slower or 'stationary' (hanging)..... being a bit of introvert I enjoy my own space but spend way too much time on work, so this was ideal as it slowed me down ('chilled feeling') and comfortable in the 'small space (camera lens feeling)', I know I was no longer on earth but again hanging in the balance of 'mid air' encapsulated in my 'bubble'. I believe this was a way for me to be told 'slow down, take it easy on yourself, stop taking on so much!'

I did not look at my morph as a spiritual being but the surroundings felt Godly, peaceful, calm and very quiet (quiet being something I crave for pertaining to my overactive thoughts). She however did not resemble what I though God would look like. There were no sounds or noise. No voices, not even background sounds.

The 'image' does not get closer of move out of the 'camera lens'.

I cannot see myself but there is an invisible 'something ('camera perhaps') in front of me. There is also an undrawn line below me, I cannot see below me but I know it is there. So an undrawn line on the ground that is not there but I know they are both there.

My morph is not happy per se, she however is also not angry; she is straight face but not hardened. Not intimidating but has a certain spunk about her. Whatever is behind her which I cannot see due to the white light is not for me to see and her 'spunk' is not going to allow me to go past her but she is totally non-aggressive - almost amusing. On earth, I would be more defiant and want to defeat anything that stands in my way... yet this was very different.

I believe between my morph, this imaginary line below me and the 'camera' I was being held back from moving forward toward my morph.

On awakening from this encounter, I immediately thought it was a dream or that the medication I was on was really powerful! The medication being last resort medication are known to fairly toxic. Something didn't fit well with me with my immediate thoughts or assumptions. Unbeknown to me I had discussed this with my husband after being discharged but have no recollection of it. He was however also in a poor state from my illness and the worries of losing me. He is not an atheist per se as when meeting him 8-9 years ago he only believed in a Maker, he then started to refer to that Maker as God over the years but had never prayed until I was on my death bed. He said it was the first time in his life he had prayed meaningfully and he asked God to spare me, he said he could feel my impending death and was desperate to not lose me.

What my husband told me is that what I had discussed with him was in relation to another death I had been affiliated with. Shaydon was born with a liver (biliary) related problem, he is Sissy's late son. They said he would not make his first Xmas and he was born on the 05.04.2003. Shaydon not only made his first Xmas, he made his 5th birthday and passed away on the 13.06.2008. I was laying alongside Shaydon most of his last days as he was at home as Sissy didn't want him to pass in a Hospice. He was being administered drugs from home to alleviate pain as he would be in a Hospice. After around 10pm of the night of the 13.06.2008 I changed Shaydon's nappy and knew this was nearing the end. He had gone into a comatose state around 3pm that afternoon. When I arrived at the house that day we shared a Lemon Twist cool drink and pomegranate seeds which he referred to as 'vrugtes' (Afrikaans for Fruit in miniature form or baby type talk).

The days preceding his were insightful. He was laying on the bed with me and started pointing at the dresser and laughing a lot..... I asked him what he was laughing at? I was immediately amused and elated just to hear him laughing as it was so special. In reply translated to English, he told me about the Angel on the dressing table and kept saying to me look and laughing his little head off. Sissy and I discussed this recently and she reminded me of another incident where he was showing her goldfish in the fish bowl which were 'not there' and resulted in her going to buy goldfish for him..... The difference here is Shaydon was wide awake while these encounters happened.

Now unbeknown to me that I had shared this experience with my husband on leaving hospital although I haven't delved on how deeply I discussed it with him and am unsure how much he would remember due to his own fragile state, but I will when I feel the 'connection' to do so. I felt alone and I felt no one would believe me. On the 04.01.19 I asked Sissy if she believes in the death tunnel but she didn't answer so I took it as a sign not to speak about it, she later revealed she missed the message. I then asked her again on the 25.01.19 to which she replied 'yes she does believe in it fully'. I however clamped up again and said I would speak to her when I was ready. She was patient.

An opportunity arose for me to speak a little more about it with my husband over a month ago, maybe even two months but he came across as 'disinterested' (in my opinion) or possibly just 'out of his league of discussion or interest', he also never mentioned the part that I had already discussed it with him when leaving hospital.... Then on the 07.05.19 I spoke to Sissy properly and was relieved with her support. I then managed to tell my youngest son (21) the next day and he was also supportive albeit not totally understanding of it. I realised I was not alone. Just over a week ago I spoke to my husband again and I told him I felt he was not supportive but he said he did listen and that is when he mentioned me speaking to him about Shaydon when I came out of hospital.... He asked me if I 'felt it' (meaning death) as he did, I replied 'Yes!' He however then confused Ellenor with Sissy so am unsure if he did listen or is just absent minded... it however does not bother me if he does not completely understand it as I believe I am on the right platform here and am reading my second Jeffrey Long book although I did read God and the Afterlife first and have now started on the former and despite already having read a little including the part where it says that it is beneficial to first read the book then fill in this form, I seemed to think I wanted to express myself first as if I had any doubt in my mind about an NDE it was perfectly clear to me after just reading the Introduction that it was real and will forever have an impact on my existence.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: Sept 2018

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Surgery-related Life threatening event, but not clinical death Dental Surgery and somehow got Klebsiella Pneumoniae which affected my lungs severely and then CRE resistance to antibiotics resorting in last resort medication – The medication eventually kicked in (or God did?).

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As explained on page 2, earth is earth and this was not earth.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? The entire time.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning As mentioned on page 2, slow down (hanging)

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. If you could get 100/100 vision versus 20/20 vision it would explain it. Probably 4 to 5 times more enhanced than daylight on earth.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. N/A, there was no sound and I was pleased with this. I enjoy the quiet.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes Not into or through but I was inside what I felt to be a tunnel. Fully described on page 2.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes As mentioned on page 2 - my morph.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Also as mentioned on page 2, bright and white and Godly!

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm As described on page 2

What emotions did you feel during the experience? As mentioned on page 2, peace, calm, quiet etc.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will My job was not done

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Other Christian Christian - Non Denomination

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Christian- Other Christian Christian - Non Denomination

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I knew this existed due to Shaydon's life and experiences but he was 5 years old and I didn't understand it then and now I do.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes It is a give and take world, and what you give you will get back; or should.... and if you are not then something has to change to fix that. I refuse to feel unloved, disrespected or alone.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin As discussed on page 2 in detail

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No Not religious as your examples but

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Again the light to me indicates this.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes Godly feelings, perfection in its epitome, the light has to be God.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes As mentioned not to let my people down.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I was aware I could not leave 'them' (loved ones) behind as they were not ready yet for my departure. I still had too much to teach.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists Yes The experience was not earthly so has to be heavenly. That is as detailed as one can get.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes As answer 36, I couldn't leave them to without properly preparing them and if I was not there it would render them helpless.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I have been forced to slow down in every sense. I have had to review my entire life from outside the box. These changes are still happening daily. I refer to my work life as past knowledge and due (fallen behind in illness), current and future (prep for things in advance).... I am fine with the current mostly, great with the future and frozen as mentioned above in the past but have hired additional help to get me through. Before, I would have seen this as failing because I wasn't coping and I now know not coping is not failing period!

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes some for the better and some for the worse but it is a work in progress.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Totally difficult, a lot of hesitance but in hindsight it was because I felt it would sound crazy. It was easier to write it than speak it as you can dig deeper for the proper wording. The unfortunate part is there are some things that words themselves cannot really explain to another human.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. At the time of my illness most of the things are hazy and I suffered afterward from PTSD and what the therapists refer to as 'Frozen' - instead of fight or flight I froze. I still battle with memory from a lot of things from prior to the operation and events but this is clear and I could draw it if I were an artist.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Sissy as mentioned previously has started to cry at times when I am struggling and yet we are in different areas at the time of it happening and I get a feeling of sadness but relief. Almost like she is taking part of my burdens.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, all of them. Nothing on earth is as it appears to be and we know so little (or knew in my case). I am blessed. I believe there is more to life than earth and getting through it, it is a learning curve but more so a teaching platform.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Explained on page 2 in detail.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Yes, but didn't put too much thought into it at the time, as mentioned with Shaydon. Also when my mom passed, the morning before she had told my brother I sat on the chair next to her the whole night like an angel watching over her but I was not there. I also just sidelined it as 'odd'.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real Doubt was creeping in because of the toxic meds and possibility of a dream....

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It is real because it is.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes When I spoke of it, I can see it and the hair on my upper left thigh raises to a point of a tingling experience and my legs had nothing to do with my illness or operation.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I am glad to have found this group and to have read the book and busy

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I think the questionnaire is a great way to express yourself although all individuals experiences are different so there may be a question that doesn't have a set answer but you can go with it and explain it as best e.g. OBE - mine wasn't but was an extension of my own body but not available as a question.... I had to do this twice. I didn't think I would cope the first time but did and then was disappointed when it failed to submit due to technical difficulties but I managed again and am relieved and hopeful it loads this time.