Bessie Probable NDE

Experience Description

I became very tired, and couldn't stay awake. I remember a strange warmth coming over me and being washed in a feeling of love, and passing out. I remember darkness, and thinking I didn't want to die, and hearing someone reassure me I would not, though there was no one there.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: April 2001

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drug or medication overdose 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death' I had overdosed on medication.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Less consciousness and alertness than normal

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Right before I was about to fall asleep with the conscious thought I wasn't ready to die.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning

Were your senses more vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My eyes were closed, my vision was duller prior to closing my eyes.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing seemed dimmed or echoing.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, but the facts have not been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I became aware of what felt like a woman I could not identify, nor was I familiar. It felt mostly feminine, actually, but I can't remember if it felt masculine as well.

The experience included: Void

The experience included: Darkness

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? tiredness, fear, love, peace

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others

Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I simply wasn't ready to die, and my fear had a large part to play in that.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant i was having a struggle with my faith at the time and was curious about other religions

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain I had already had wavering beliefs and this reinforced that.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Other faiths- New age mostly spiritualist

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience i was aware of something that seemed to be of divine feminine in nature and that did not reflect the religious beliefs i held at that time.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes It took time, but I believe it only aided in moving me along toward a new set of beliefs. I also became more aware of spirits after my near death experience, but I also suffered severe depression and trauma afterward.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I heard a voice I could not identify

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists No

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? Unknown

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes it didn't have to be as hard as i made it to be.

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes merely a feeling of being surrounded by strong love, all encompassing love, love i had looked for my whole life

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life Moderate changes in my life. I feel more connected with the divine, and more connected with the afterlife, and I feel more comfortable in my body. I have had more than one near death experience and with each experience, I fear death less and less. More than fearing death, I fear living a meaningless life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes It made me and my mother grow closer.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience i remember very specific thoughts of feelings of the experience, during the experience, but my physical senses are a blur as well as time.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I started being able to see spirits, talk to spirits, feel spirits, have visions, and heal with energy.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The feeling of love I encountered.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes 6 to 8 weeks with my mother. I'm not aware of how it moved her.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definately not real I couldn't understand it and thought I was going crazy.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real After having met many people with similar experiences, it changed my point of view.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Meditation: a feeling of being frozen and cold but warm at the same time. Feeling like I am falling into a void. I also have experience nearly having a deadly car accident, where time seemed to freeze. I spun out in the rain across four lanes of rush hour traffic where I had had visions of the same thing occurring for months.