Bonnie M NDE

Experience Description

In consciousness I remember the surgeon telling me that I had to have surgery. He showed me the x-ray but I didn't understand what I was looking at. Then they put a tube in my nose to keep me from the constant vomiting. I don't remember anything after that in the emergency room.

I did not see a light; it was more as though I was traveling in space, and the feeling of having a destination. An overwhelming feeling of acceptance is all I can say is the feeling I had, as though it didn't matter. Anything I could think of that I had done would matter that all the love in the not world as this is never anything in the world I have felt, but so powerful that it encompassed my very being as though I became what I was feeling.

Then I saw a mist of light in the middle of where I was going. All at once, I was in front of these beings of light, they were much more taller than I and I can't say that I saw faces or arms just outlines sort of. Between us was a table like from the 'Flintstones' cartoon in that it looked to be out of a flat stone with stone stools holding it up from underneath. I was directed to come closer, not by hearing sounds but by more of a feeling direction on coming closer.

As I drew closer, I was directed to look at the top of the stone, I then saw myself in a wheelchair and very sick, I looked up and without talking asked why? I was only directed to continue to look at the stone. The stone was as like a clear lake reflection and that is how the pictures changed. The wheelchair scene went to seeing myself before multitudes of people talking before them on a stage, then to me very sick again and close to death, the scene changed again as I cried as I had a feeling of the experience being real, I knew it wasn't a dream.

I then saw myself getting better then speaking before more people than before and being healed and that I was teaching others how to heal themselves. I saw myself having healing centers and teaching many how to overcome the illusions of this world. I had many questions for these beings but they only relayed to me by a type of feeling that I would understand as these things happened. It was relayed that I was not dead and I've never felt that that was the case. I was then shown many wondrous things of crystal light buildings, full of prisms of light as we went to another pyramid tower. There I was shown things that I am not to speak of; I can only say that the time is assured and is happening now indeed has happened many times.

The next thing I remember is waking up in my hospital room after two weeks to ask my nurse where I was - I had been feeling the confusion of the mind and had lost the clarity that was my mind just prior to waking up here. The surgeon came in and I asked the question again, how did I get here and where was I? He told me that it was the morphine, my reply was that the morphine was incapable of doing what I had experienced as I had a morphine trip before and it was of monkeys jumping on my bed asking me for bananas, this was NOT that!!!!

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: June/1997

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes 'I had intestines rip in several places and did not know it. The next day I could not stop vomiting and went to the emergency room where it was discovered my body was full of poisons, the hospital called my family to come say goodbye to me, as the surgeo Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I had had a pain in the lower abdomen but I always had Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) I thought that it was a bad IBS pain. It was in fact the tearing of intestine where my feces broke through the wall. I didn't go to the emergency room until the next afternoon when I could not stop vomiting.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I have to say that it was during the realization when I knew the feeling of acceptance from then on, it was very overwhelming.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I felt that time did not exist, I could have been there forever and it wouldn't have mattered here.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was as though I was the light also that everything else was, so my vision was more interpretive than when I see with eyes.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. There was no hearing with ears it was as with the mind but not really that either.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain It was as if I was traveling in space but then a wispy like that I went to and then I was in an area where the beings where.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes They were of light much taller than us, they were in an area like a room without walls there was no restrictive walls, it is hard to describe, it was an area. My future was communicated and the human future was communicated. There were twelve of them, but the one in the middle was the only one that not spoke but in my mind talked to me but not with words, of pictures it was a knowing. I was shown things that have happened. I was shown to be in a wheelchair which happened one year after, and I was diagnosed with a disease sarcoidodis, I could not breathe and walk it was so bad. I was shown that I would speak to multitudes of people, which has happened - I became a patient activist and traveled speaking before crowds. I was shown that I would get really sick again which a few years later I got on oxygen, but I was shown that I would get healed, and that is happening. The Australians discovered that sarcoidosis is caused by nano-bacterial and I am on a medical protocol right now that got me off oxygen and I am out of the wheelchair also - which I was shown. Now I am becoming a minister and in a few years as I was shown I will be talking before even more people on a spiritual level how to heal themselves. All this I have been shown and it has and it is happening, this was not a dream!!!!!!! I told many people before it happened what to expect. When I was on oxygen many family members wanted to know how I wanted to be buried as my oxygen level was 84!!!!! I was dying but now I am at 99 and the sarcoidosis is being healed, that doesn't happen with this disease!!!

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain Through the wispy there was a lighted area that I moved to.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm yes it was in this universe but was a place that has transfigured to the next level so the body has shed it's densness,the planet is of light but the beings are brighter than the planet

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Total acceptance is the only way I can describe it, it is unlike anything that is experienced here.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

The experience included: Special Knowledge

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

The experience included: Vision of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I have described this before above.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal 'never really thought about it, I knew that there was something, hadn't gone to church since the 3rd grade I think'

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I no longer see the world as a Christian does I have become a member and in training to become a minister for 'Science of Mind Spiritual Centers'. They believe that we are all mini-creators of our own lives and that science is our friend, not an enemy. But even here I still am alone as I still see the worries of this plane as though it matters so much. The trivial still rules. I love quantum physics now; it is hard to find others to talk to, as I am not into what most people are into anymore. I don't talk or gossip and I feel sorry for ninety-nine percent of most people I meet and know. Most folks don't understand me anymore.

What is your religion now? Liberal training to be in the Science of Mind ministries

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I no longer see the world as a Christian does I have become a member and in training to become a minister for 'Science of Mind Spiritual Centers'. They believe that we are all mini-creators of our own lives and that science is our friend, not an enemy. But even here I still am alone as I still see the worries of this plane as though it matters so much. The trivial still rules. I love quantum physics now; it is hard to find others to talk to, as I am not into what most people are into anymore. I don't talk or gossip and I feel sorry for ninety-nine percent of most people I meet and know. Most folks don't understand me anymore.

The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes That we are not what we think we are, we are so much more and there is no need to be lonely, we are such beloved beings it is the saddest thing. I look at people now and I wish that I could tell them the love that they could possess if they could just understand the illusion. We live in a life of duality, in which the ego keeps us prisoner. Even though the world seems to be in turmoil it doesn't matter we will become what it is for us to be as it is what we really are, it can be no other way. We are not this body nor are we the mind as we know it. The egoist mind we know is also an illusion that keeps us from the truth of ourselves, even when those who are seemingly enlightened claim to hear a voice it is just a shadow of what is real. There are so many road signs that teach us who we are here, I never saw them before but now it is all so very clear. We are as that which made us, and in that, we are creators regardless of if it is positive or negative in our lives. There is much more to share, too much to write.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I got away from my ex-husband, who is an atheist and abusive, but I also had a crash of my own beliefs also. Average Christians are unaware because of judgments, can't relate to anyone I used to know at all. My whole life has become more of being alone in meditation, but it is okay because I know that I am never alone, none of us are.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The feeling of acceptance is so overwhelming that I am crying now as I think of it, it makes me have to catch my breath.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Earthquakes, dreams of others I know what they mean, and knowing others most secret feelings. I have understandings of things that I never even thought of before.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Standing at the great table made of stone and looking at myself in the wheelchair then speaking to people, crowds, then getting sicker, then speaking again, I wanted to know why me? I wasn't special and didn't want to be.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes From the beginning, many tell me that I should write a book and others tell me that being around me and talking to them changes their life, that I explain things to them that that they have never heard before but so profound that it changes them hearing me.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Just generally like most of the population. I had never really thought of if it was true or not it wasn't part of my life. It affected me in the way that I had always thought that you see a bright light and dead people, but my NDE wasn't ANYTHING like that mine was prophetic and with light beings at another place.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I was so sure that when I was diagnosed with sarcoidosis after the fact and then got in the wheelchair it was amazing. At the point when I almost died, which I was shown, when my oxygen went to 84 my family insisted that I was wrong I kept saying that my healing would come. My sister asked me what color I wanted to be buried in and I still remember the anger at her for her asking me that especially after the other things already happening. It was about three or four days later that my son ,who believed as much as I, told me he had found a cure in Australia and that the biochemical engineer was here in the state working with the Food and Drug Administration (department) to get it approved for doctors to administer it here, it was a miracle. Within eight months I was out of the wheelchair and had a good oxygen level.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Because it is still happening, the things I saw.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Meditation I find can give me a fraction of the peace and help to remember the insight.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? This really happened and has changed my life for the better even though I am not socially the butterfly I used to be, the things that most people are interested in I find empty.