Briana L NDE

Experience Description

My NDE took place in 2013, in the hospital. I was 27 weeks pregnant with my daughter and went into pre-term labor. It happened slowly; I had only dilated two centimeters. They admitted me and gave me a medication that would stop my contractions, or at least slow them down. My body had an immediate, negative response to the medication. I remember telling the nurse that I felt dizzy, and they had me lay down. She was fairly calm and said she was going to tilt my bed back so that my head was lower than my feet. This would help blood flow towards my head. The next thing I remember is her calling for help.

In a split second, I was looking down at my body. I could see everything from the corner of the room, where the walls meet the ceiling. I remember an alarm going off and multiple nurses rushing into the room. They were frantic, yelling commands to each other. I could no longer see my body because it was blocked by nurses and doctors in their blue and green scrubs.

Then everything was black, I was no longer in the hospital room, but I could tell I was moving forward. I’m assuming this was 'the tunnel'. I don’t remember emerging though. I was just suddenly in a space. It was more like a plane with no ceiling, floor, or walls. It was a completely open area. The color around me was a light grey. There was no gravity. I felt like I was floating, or like I was underwater. There was something in the air, that was like fog or clouds, but I could see through it.

I could feel a presence with me. What appeared before me is difficult to explain, as I have never seen anything like them before. They were two Beings, for lack of a better term. They were dark, almost all black. They were oval in shape and had some sort of extremities protruding from the bottom. I wouldn’t call them legs and I’m not sure what their purpose would have been. This is just the best way I could describe them. After years of thought, I don’t think there are any words to describe what they looked like. My description makes them sound scary or intimidating. But they were the opposite. They brought much comfort and gave a sense of understanding. They never spoke. Neither did I. There were no audible words or sounds exchanged or heard at all. But there was communication. Call it mind-reading or telepathy. I still don’t know what to call it.

They made me aware of what happened and that I was dying. They communicated that I had permission to stay on earth, or to move on. Either way, they made it known that I couldn't stay there. I don’t know where I would have moved on to. They never told me that. But they did let me know the choice was mine and I could decide what I wanted to do. Although the decision was mine, they wanted me to have a piece of vital information. They said that if I did move on, I would be leaving something unfinished. They said there was still work that could only be done if I returned to my body. They did not make the implication that I would be selfish for moving on. They simply made sure that I knew I would be leaving something behind that was not yet done. It’s obvious that I decided to come back. But it happened so abruptly. I feel as though I was sent back before I even finished considering whether or not I wanted to stay.

In another split second, I was back in my body. The doctor was in the room when I woke up and made a joke 'Looks like you were in preterm labor and they almost killed you trying to stop it.'. It took me 9 years to tell anyone about this experience. I was afraid I might be judged or that people would call me crazy. But I can’t deny what happened and I know I couldn’t have made it up. This experience has helped me in many ways, one way being that I am not afraid of death. I know there is something more after this life. I think about that encounter every day. Part of me wonders what would have happened if I stayed. Where I would have moved on to? What that looked like? However, I am glad that I returned. I had a beautiful daughter at 36 weeks. I know that was part of the unfinished business those beings told me about. But I know that there is more unfinished business.

I struggle with mental illness and whenever suicide ideation comes, I remember my NDE and the message those beings gave me. And it makes me want to stay. I believe that they helped save my life that day and they continue to do so today. I know they will continue to do so until it’s my time to go. This experience was sacred and divine. Regardless of what anyone says about religion, this spiritual experience has proved to me that we are not alone. Call it aliens. Call it angels. Whatever it is, there is something bigger than us on earth. There is something else out there. Some may find that scary, but it gives me hope. More hope than I’ll ever need in this lifetime.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 10/24/2013

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Allergic Reaction Life threatening event, but not clinical death. I had an allergic reaction to a medication that caused my heart rate to spike to a very dangerous level.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Neither pleasant NOR distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I could see and hear the nurses calling for help and the beeping from the machines around my bed. This was verified real after I woke up and was told by the doctor and my family what happened. It matched exactly to what I saw. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. I was more conscious and alert than normal in the sense that I was paying attention to every detail, even multiple details at once. I felt very hyper-aware and like all of my senses were highly increased.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I would say I had the same level of consciousness and alertness the entire time.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. I do not believe that time existed in the space that I was in. This is something that I know I will probably never be able to put into words myself. It didn't feel long or short. It didn't feel rushed. I didn't have a sense of waiting. It was as if time never existed at all.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. During my NDE everything seemed enhanced; down to the texture of the things I was seeing. It was almost like I could feel what I was seeing just from looking at it. It was very bizarre and all of my senses were heightened, not just my vision.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The hearing during my experience was interesting. Everything sounded muffled, like I was underwater or listening through a wall, while I was still in the hospital room hearing the nurses yelling and the machines beeping. But when I encountered those Beings, there was no audible communication, but I could hear movement. I'm not sure how to describe this, but it was a specific sound. It sounded hollow and was inconsistent. That's probably the best I can do for now.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain. I don't remember a tunnel specifically. But there was a gap between the hospital room and the plane I was in that was just complete darkness. I do remember a feeling of movement while I was in that darkness that makes me think it was a tunnel. But I do not have any recollection of visibly being in a tunnel.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The realm that I was in was an open space. There were no ceilings, floors or walls. The color around me was light grey. There was a smoky fog like look around but I could see through it. There was no gravity. I had a floating sensation, it felt like I was underwater. There were noises, the tones were mostly low pitched and hollow sounding. I'm not sure where it came from, but it would come and go at a constant rate.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt wonder mostly. I was never scared or afraid. I was more in shock, but the type of shock when you're in awe of something. I was stunned and impressed. I was mind-blown by what I had experienced. I was a bit sad when I came back to my body. There was also a strong sense of curiosity and there still is.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe. I don't want to claim that I understood Everything about the universe. But I do believe that I understood that there is more than just this one life. We may not even end up there. But I do strongly and firmly believe that we don't know as much about the universe as we think. And I put my faith in the belief that we (or I) will be welcomed by something or will go somewhere else after death.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control. I'm not sure how to describe this which is why I selected Uncertain. But I do remember thinking about the traumas in my past. My father died in a drunk driving accident when I was 4 and when I was 7 I was sexually abused. I'm not sure how or when these came up in my NDE, but I do remember the Being acknowledged.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life. The Beings did make it clear that I had a decision to make. I could either return to my body or move on. But remaining in the space I was in with them was not an option. I had to move forward or go back. They made it very clear that the decision was fully mine and that I was the one who was in charge of whether I lived or died. But they said that if I moved on I would be leaving something unfinished. They didn't imply that moving on would be selfish of me. They simply made it necessary for me to have the knowledge before making my decision that I would be leaving something, that had already been started, unfinished. I could tell that was a vital piece of information that they needed to give me. I never found out what that unfinished business was. They never told me. Maybe they didn't even know. But it piqued my curiosity enough and evoked a sense of responsibility in myself that I decided to return to my body.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes The biggest change in my spiritual beliefs is that I no longer believe that there is a hell. I was terrified of it growing up and the relief that I feel now that I don't believe it exists is wild and I feel bad that my younger self lived in such fear.

What is your religion now? Christian- Other Christian I grew up Christian but now I am Deconstructing. Meaning I am unlearning the toxic parts that some churches preach and trying to see what the religion is truly about based solely off of what the bible says. I don't have a specific label right now, so I just use the term 'Deconstructing Christian'.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. My NDE was nothing like what I was taught growing up Christian. This experience actually shifted my view of Christianity and has caused me to want to understand it more. There was no 'light at the end of the tunnel' or 'pearly gates' like you hear Christians talk about. If anything, it was the opposite. It was not light; it was gloomy and grey. There was no light at the end of the tunnel, I was surrounded by darkness. And there was no God on the throne, it was two dark, mysterious and somewhat ominous looking beings. So, this experience was not only non-consistent with the beliefs I had, it was quite frankly the opposite.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I'm not sure why, but this experience made me stop believing that there is a hell. I don't know what exactly it was that caused that belief to go away, but after this experience my worry of going to hell completely vanished.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. I encountered two mystical/unearthly beings. They were very dark, almost all black. Oval in shape. Extremely large in size. They had multiple extremities protruding from underneath of them. They were solid but had a smoky colored fog coming off of their surface all around them. The closest thing I could compare them to is an octopus or maybe jellyfish. But they were far more different than those. That's just for the sake of comparison. I never touched them but I could see that they had multiple textures. Some parts were solid and some were not. There were some divots on them. Dips on the surface, it was not all flat. Some parts were bumpy, some looked smooth and shiny. But they were not all one texture.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain. I selected uncertain because I didn't have specific information regarding earthly life's purpose. But I do know that at least my life has a purpose, due to them making me aware that I would be leaving something unfinished if I did not return to my body. So, I do not know specifically earthly life's meaning or purpose, but I do believe that it has one, or at least mine does.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Uncertain It was not specific information that there was a continued existence after earthly life. But they did mention the option of 'moving on'. And it was not an option to stay in the place I was with them. So, to me that suggests that there is something more after life-and afterlife. I think that if there wasn't then I wouldn't have been given the option to move on.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes It's difficult to explain the things I saw and encountered because it was all so foreign to me that I don't have much to compare it to when trying to help others understand what it was like overall. It was completely otherworldly so I feel like I don't even have the proper vocabulary to explain it in a way that others could grasp.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The most meaningful part of my experience were the two beings I encountered. I always wonder why it was two and not one, or three. But they brought so much comfort and understanding. It felt like they had known me since I was born. Like they were my family of some sort. And it means a lot to me that they were there with me to walk me through the process and to lay out all of my options and what staying or moving on would look like.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I did not speak of this experience to anyone for 9 years. The first person I told was really into NDE's which made me comfortable enough to tell them. They were in awe and thought it was really interesting. I have only shared this with a handful of people since.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew immediately that what had happened was real. I don't really know why I knew it was real. I was just sure of it deep down inside, there was no question to it.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I always knew the experience was real. But after hearing other people's personal accounts and doing some research about NDE's, it was confirmed that mine was real, as it matched up exactly.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Not at this time

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