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I was out to dinner with my partner at a restaurant inside a casino. She asked me if I had ever had a raw seaweed salad. I replied that I had not, but I would love to try it. We ordered some sushi to go along with it. The salad arrived first, so I began with that. I had had about five small bites before the sushi arrived. I stopped eating the salad and started trying to work out the strands stuck between my teeth. I began eating my sushi. I remember being a bit startled as I was swallowing the last of the first piece of sushi, that after such a small amount of food that I should feel this full. I ate another piece of sushi, even though I already felt full because it tasted so good. That, and I kind of felt guilty to say, 'thanks, I'm done, I'm full,' after eating so little of the meal. As I started on the second piece, I started feeling disoriented. My partner's voice began to sound sort of distorted. The scene of the restaurant looked slanted a few degrees to the right and a touch elongated. As I picked up the third piece of sushi, I had a sudden explosion of nausea and an unbearable sensation of fullness that I was on the verge of projectile emesis. As I released the piece of sushi from between my fingers, my head began to feel extremely heavy. It dropped forward I believe, but I could not tell you for sure because I was now greatly disoriented. I raised my head and said, 'I think I need help.' It had taken a great deal of effort to pick my head up and utter those words, and as such my head immediately dropped at the end of that proclamation. Now I am really unclear which way my head had fallen. I could hear my partner, in what seemed to be off at a distance, even though I was aware she was still next to me. As I heard her voice and another unidentified voice, I could not make out what was being said because of all of the disorientation within my own head. I remember having the thought that this is even more serious than I thought; and I needed to emphasize this fact quickly, before I was no longer able, the urgency of this need for help. I gathered all the strength I could muster, lifted my head back up, and said, 'I need 911!' Now my head fell for the last time. The disorientation fell away and I was now floating. I was floating and I was so comfortable. I was surrounded by warmth and the most brilliant yet, gentle light that was so soothing on the eyes. I was surrounded by love, by peace, by yesterday, by tomorrow and by today; by all of time, by nothing, and by everything. Ahhhhh! I know this place. I have been here before. I was here when I was three years old. I am home! Then I realize it isn't exactly the same. When I was here before, that beautiful and delicate dome made of fine threads of gold mist crotched into an intricate veil, was nowhere to be seen. As I realize this difference the scene changes as it dissipates and simultaneously I hear a chorus of very young children's voices, none of them whom I recognize. They were chant together telling me, 'Stay with us! Stay with us!' Then I was trying to figure out which side the voices came from. Was it from the physical realm or the spiritual realm? In other words, where were these young children wanting me to go? I was never able to determine where they came from because, crashing on the heels of that chorus, I was immediately submersed in a mist that shimmered in the light. This mist, which was now me, was wavering and drifting ever so subtly. Although there was no tangible demarcation line, I could sense; I could feel. I knew that I was hovering at the edge of no return. It was entirely up to me. I could go home right now. I know home, I know this place. The 'oneness', the place of love, peace, understanding and knowledge of all is also the place where time does not exist. All of what we humans call 'time' is present in this 'oneness'. As I was drifting toward, and on the verge of crossing the threshold of no return, the words I spoke to my partner not more than a week or two before. 'I have no intention of abandoning you,' came back to me. I audibly heard myself say those words. I realized then that if I continued drifting 'home', I would be exercising a choice contrary to my words. The moment I decided that I wanted to keep my word, I left the 'oneness'. I was now back in the restaurant and moving back into my body; which now, for all intent and purpose, was paralyzed. I could not move anything. I couldn't even move my mouth and I was in a neutral black void. I could now hear many voices. I could understand what they were saying now. It was strange though, because even though I knew everyone was nearby me, it sounded like the were all speaking from a long distance down a tube or tunnel of sorts. Occasionally, they would speak directly to me. I could hear them asking various requests of me. For some time, even though I understood the command or question, I had no physical capacity with which to respond. I remember having to struggle very hard, as if through a very thick viscous gel, to pull my awareness and strength together to help these people help me. At this point, and for most of the remainder of this event, I was in and out of consciousness.
Background Information:
Gender: Female
Date NDE Occurred: September 2, 2015 NDE Elements:
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Allergic Reaction Other unsure Anaphylactic shock
How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes While I was still feeling apart from my body, after I entered the 'oneness', I could hear all the people around me. I could hear with exceptional clarity what they were saying, albeit they sounded as if they were speaking from the distant end of a long tube/tunnel. I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I suppose the best way to describe it is that everything became much more 'vivid' in the most extreme manner, if you will. It seems to me, that when one begins to truly comprehend how expansive and vast the 'oneness' is, you can't help but have an exponentially increased awareness.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I believe the entire time I was the 'oneness', that I was at my highest level of consciousness
Were your thoughts speeded up? No
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning All of 'time' as we know it, was now 'present' so to speak.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My everyday sight is less than optimal, even with the use of optics. However, during the event my vision reminded me of my vision as a youth (20/15) and with even a greater clarity and more vivid colors than that of my yesteryear.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. While having the out of body sensation, my auditory senses felt as if they heard and comprehended at an extraordinary level, and with complete ease and zero effort. Conversely, my everyday hearing tends to require some degree of focused effort.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No
Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes It was the awareness encompassing all: those that I have known from my experiences in this lifetime, and all of those that have, do, or will ever exist.
The experience included: Unearthly light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes As I long as I can remember I have always experienced photophobia. However, in the 'oneness' I was surrounded and immersed in a light that was intensely bright and yet incredibly soothing at the same time.
The experience included: A landscape or city
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The 'oneness' is a more than just another world, as it encompasses 'all'.
The experience included: Strong emotional tone
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Unconditional love, elation, joy, peace, comfort, acceptance, compassion
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe While in the 'oneness', I understood everything.
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events This a bit difficult, in that, did specifics of my life 'flash before my eyes’? The answer would be no. However, all that I have gleaned throughout all of this life's experiences were suddenly all right there with me. It was from within this sudden knowledge of all the I have experienced, that I really began to understand that everything I have been through, (including the neglect, childhood physical, mental, and emotional abuse, the sexual abuse, the incest, the violent drowning, the rape, the military sexual trauma, et al, and cancer). As well all of the most wonderfully miraculous people and times I have encountered, that indeed 'life is good', and 'everything is exactly as it should be'. We are here to 'experience', and we are here to 'expand' the 'collective conscious'.
The experience included: Awareness of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future I wouldn't necessarily describe it as scenes, but more of an awareness of my personal future.
The experience included: Boundary
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes There was an awareness of a boundary of no return. It wasn't something that I saw per se, but rather a sense of the existence of such a threshold denominating the point of no return.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life Just as I was drifting and approaching the point of no return, and feeling at complete peace with leaving this physical world, I heard a chorus of many small children, chanting together, saying, 'stay with us!, stay with us!' I was still going to cross, as I had been unable to distinguish from which side of the threshold, this request was generated. Just before crossing that line, I audibly heard me speaking the words I had recently spoken to my partner, 'I have no intention of abandoning you'. At this point, I realized that since the choice to stay or go was entirely up to me, if I chose to cross I would in effect not be keeping my word. God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me
What was your religion prior to your experience? No comment R of R
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I am able to meditate into a much deeper level, and with many enlightening new experiences.
What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me
What is your religion now? No comment R of R
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I’m not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I’m not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin A 'being' per se, was not my encounter, rather the sense, knowledge, and participation of all, a 'collective conscious' if you will.
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I sensed their presence
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes As stated in a previous answer, they were the awareness of 'all' in the 'oneness'. It truly encompasses 'ALL'
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes as previously stated, the 'oneness' exists of all, and of all of 'time'; and as such, each of us have always existed in one realm or another.
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I don't know how to explain it other than, it just is. When you enter the 'oneness’, you know...
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God does not exist
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes In my experience, there was no one specific 'superior', it is a 'collective conscious', and all within is equal. God does not exist.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God does not exist Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are meaningful and significant
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I really understood that we are here to experience 'all that life has to offer', every aspect of it.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife definitely exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes All is the 'oneness' and we are, and will return to this 'oneness'.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? I slightly feared death
Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life
Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes Not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes I comprehended at an even deeper level, that everything in our lives, the good, the bad, the indifferent, can all be turned into amazing 'gifts'. Whether or not we believe it, everything that we experience is ultimately to our own benefit, so long as we choose to make it so.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Slightly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Unconditional love is real. Unconditional love is for everyone. Yes, everyone!!!
Were you compassionate after your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Not ready to share some aspects, just yet. Not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I learned that I need to stop trying to help my family members. We are all in this physical existence to 'experience' life, every aspect of life. If I am always running to their rescue, I am denying them of, well…everything. After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes Words that could most aptly edify and exemplify everything that I experienced elude me.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the ex My remembrance of any of my life events/experiences, wax and wane depending on where my thoughts and emotions are at any given moment. When I now meditate, and as my appreciation grows, my memories of the experience do flood and engulf me and I am able to return to that sublime bliss.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Not ready to share some aspects, just yet.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? If I had to choose a single word to share with others, so that they might have a glimpse of what I experienced, I would tell them to 'appreciate!' Appreciation, true appreciation, unlocks a completely new dimension.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Condensed version
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes In that, I had had one at age 3, but it wasn't until after this NDE that I realized that that experience had also been an NDE.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It is confusing for quite some time after. You know that you know it was real, but yet, there is this awe about the experience that is so unfathomable that it is sometimes difficult to really wrap your head around.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes At age three, I had a very similar experience. After this second NDE, when I meditate, I have many experiences, some of which are of the same substance as my NDEs.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Not at this time, thank you.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I would just like to ask, on question #6, would not the word 'sped' as in, 'Were your thoughts 'sped' up?' be more appropriate? I am not trying to be obnoxious or picky, just a question of genuine curiously ;). [NDERF: Unfortunately, that is part of the Greyson scale wording, so we are not at liberty to change the question, or the responses can't be included in research.]
I am not yet ready to discuss all the circumstances leading up to this drowning, but neither is it relevant just now. I can remember the physical struggle. I know that I fought as physically hard as my little 3 year old body could. I can remember my head was at the end opposite the faucet. I looked up and saw the light above from beneath the rippling water. It made a beautiful, asymmetrical pattern above, as all the waves collided overhead. At first I was looking at the light on the bathroom ceiling, but it shifted into an endless expanse of the most comforting and soothing, beautiful light. The light was both, warm and cool, at the same time. In the same way that the light engulfed me, so did the most sublime and serene sense of love and peace envelope me. There was no longer any beginning and any ending. It was as if all of time, it was all, exactly now. I gained the infinite knowledge that absolutely nothing is impossible. I was brought back from that place just as unexpectedly and I had arrived there. I came back to consciousness by the excruciatingly painful contractions forced upon my little body by my mother whom apparently and suddenly came to her senses and realized what she had just done. I distinctly remember three such contractions, spaced some seconds apart, while water was projected and expelled from my lungs. After the water expulsion and before the next convulsive squeeze from my mother, I can remember gagging, chocking, and coughing, while trying simultaneously and desperately to get some air in. Whenever I look back on that time, or whenever I am in or on the water, I know that absolutely everything is just as it should be.
Date NDE Occurred: ~'69 or'70 NDE Elements:
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drowning. Criminal attack. Other: unknown I was being held under the water in the upstairs bathtub, at the hands of my own mother.
Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal There is no possible way to put into words an experience that words, such as sublime, stunning, spectacular, extraordinary, and unimaginable. I can't even begin to scratch the surface of definition for this infinite expanse of love and knowledge.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? From the moment my little body ceased struggling, until just before having the water expelled from my lungs.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Time had no meaning. Time is simply an indicator we use in the physical realm to be able to mark and refer to an event/experience so that physical beings can be on the 'same page', so to speak, when referring to something.
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. The difference in vision from every day is comparative to running on just one cylinder of a 12-cylinder engine, compared to running all 12 perfectly tuned cylinders.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I heard the most beautiful sound of silence at the time of the experience. For many years afterwards, I would hear the most beautiful symphonies play out in my head; ones I had never heard before, or since then.
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Uncertain Yes and no. I don't know how to explain that I did not know who anyone was, and yet at the same time, I knew who everyone was.
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I do not recall if prior to this NDE (I have now had 2 in my life), I had a sensitivity to light, but in any case, this brilliant bright light was not only sans pain, it was extremely soothing on the eyes, and surrounded your body in the most perfect temperature.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I knew that I was no longer on what we know as the physical earth.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt the most astonishing sense of peace, the basking in, not only the sense, but also the true knowledge of unconditional love.
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe Yes, there is nothing to explain or elaborate on, just simply, 'yes'
Did scenes from your past come back to you? No
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future Not 'scenes' per se, but knowledge and sensations regarding my future
Did you come to a border or point of no return? No God, Spiritual and Religion:
What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Unknown
What was your religion prior to your experience? Do not know at age 3 I had no religious background per se
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Over time, yes, and then exponentially after a 2nd NDE some 46 years later.
What is your religion now? R of R
Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I do not know what my beliefs were up to and until the time of 'the experience'
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Uncertain
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin It was mystical presences, not an individual being, but the presence of ALL: all that have ever been and all that will ever be. I refer to it as the collective 'oneness'; the collective conscious, if you will.
Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Yes I became aware of all: past, present and future
During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain I am not aware of what I knew or did not know at that young age
During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes See above regarding 'the oneness'.
Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably exists
During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes The sense that the supreme is not at all singular, but is all that ever is, was, or will ever be.
Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? Unknown Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I did not know what exactly it would entail, but I was/am acutely aware that the purpose would unfold before me in due time.
During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes A gleaned awareness of life's earthly meaning, but not until my NDE in my late 40's, did I have a much greater understanding.
Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? An afterlife probably exists
Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes The oneness is all-encompassing it is everything, and it is all of time. An afterlife definitely exists.
Did you fear death prior to your experience? Unknown
Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life
Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Uncertain All I know is that I was always different than other people and that very few others saw life in the same way I did. As long as I can remember, the one word that I have heard my entire life that people use to describe me is 'weird'...and so it goes.
During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes See previous response.
Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others
During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I now knew that, as my little mind had suspected, but had not experienced at the hands of my mother, that unconditional love really did exist out there somewhere.
What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? I have had a most interesting life up and to this point, I know that 'the experience' has played an integral role in my life, but to what extent there is truly no way to accurately gage, given I had so little life experience prior to 'the experience'.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes That, in and of itself, is quite a story. After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There simply are not any words that can come close to adequately describing the extraordinarily, intense depth of the entire experience.
How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. The events surrounding 'the experience' have only come together more recently. However, 'the experience' itself has always had a special place within my awareness, if you will. It was not until I had another NDE 46 years later did I actually realize the rarity, the gravity, and significance of 'the experience' on my entire life.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I believe so.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Although, over the course of my life I have now, and again lost sight of all that I KNOW to be true and real (that is: the knowledge that 'it is all good' and 'everything is exactly as it should be'). It always comes back to me when I am most in need :)
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I don't know when I first shared it. Since I was so young, it was an integral part of my life and I never realized it was unusual or significant.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I don't know the actual time frame from 'the experience' to the awareness at age 4 that I had. I most vividly recall staring in the mirror, and while gazing in the mirror, contemplating, with such amazement, how 'I', the being that is 'me' came to be in this young physical body that I was now staring at in the mirror.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Water is my bliss! Whenever I am in or around water, I feel the calm, the peace, the serenity, the love, the joy and the beauty that is everything; and that everything is.
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Two things: 1) inconceivable 2) the universal truth is, nothing is impossible!
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Not that I can think of at the moment
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