Christopher H Possible NDE

Experience Description

I had my gallbladder removed and went home. I had to be rushed back to the local hospital two days after the procedure. They found a large pocket of bile in my abdomen. I was then moved to a major hospital. I had gone four days without food or water, just intravenous fluids and tongue swabs. I was on incredible amounts of pain medication. The doctor at the major hospital was amazed at this amount of medication and he tried to lower it. But, I woke up screaming in pain to the point of losing my voice. Nurses and doctors rushed in and the levels of medications were raised once again. I was a daily drinker at the time. A six-pack a day was not uncommon and I have been told this has an effect on the effectiveness of pain medication.

My vitals kept dropping, I had a fever, and my gut continued leaking toxic bile into my body. The specialist came and told me that 'things didn't look very good.' He said, 'I'm very good at what I do. I'm even one of the best, but things happen and I can't promise you anything.' I fully accepted the extent of what I was facing. They had given me pain medication before taking me to surgery and had to give me more before the procedure. This was on top of the anesthesia that put me under. I went through the procedure and it was successful. But, my body had been badly damaged. Once they got me back up to my room, they started pumping me with tons of drugs including more intravenous and oral pain medication. I even questioned the nurse because I was feeling no pain and she reassured me that I was going to need it and that we needed to stay ahead of the pain. About 20 minutes later, I started to realize that I was having to remind myself to breathe. I should have informed the nurse, but instead I let myself start drifting.

There was a movie playing on the TV and I recall saying to myself, 'WOW...these are some good drugs because I feel like I'm at a rave.' I was seeing a fantastic array of colors. I've done LSD and psilocybin mushrooms and they are sugar candy compared to what I was experiencing. Soon I was wrapped in the colors and felt my spirit being lifted upward. I started passing through what felt like different realms, like veils of energy. As I was lifted through each veil, I began to move faster and faster to the point I felt like I was traveling a light speed. Each time I passed through a realm, I could see geometrical forms that looked like sacred geometry. I would absorb each one and it was as if I was receiving all the knowledge of the universe. I was having a trillion thoughts a second. I was aware of all things. I felt like I was back in a familiar place once again. At that moment I was pulled through the final veil, everything was perfectly still. I was in a place that felt like the center of the universe. I could see galaxies slowly spinning as they revolved around me and I was aware that I was not alone. I was being held in the still presence of a universal spirit. I was filled with a truly indescribable feeling of pure LOVE. I was one with this spirit, filled with love and the knowledge of the universe. I knew I was home.The presence of love never spoke in any human fashion, but I still felt like I had all understanding. The next thing I knew, I was being woken by a nurse telling me I could finally have something to drink.

Before this experience, I was in a really bad place in life. I was drinking a lot and was have a lot of suicidal thoughts. I probably would have actually gone through with it if it weren't for my love for my wife and daughter. After the experience, I woke the next day feeling like all that had been lifted off me. I felt like I was once again in balance with the universe. Unfortunately, that only lasted a couple of months.

As the memory of the experience faded, I felt increasingly depressed. I tried desperately to hold on to that feeling of love but just couldn't. I had stopped drinking, but it wasn't long until all my old habits had come back and I was back in that darkness. I questioned what happened with me and began to just write it off as some side-effect of medication overdose. I was still in a lot of pain from the procedures and the doctors couldn't figure out why. Life seemed to go from bad to worse and then something strange happened.

I had YouTube playing on my TV and was half paying attention to it. I had let it play random videos. One came on with a guy who was talking about his honest experience with heroin. He was talking about how he loved to push heroin to the limit and how he had a NDE while on it. He started talking about being lifted up through different levels and seeing different geometrical shapes. That REALLY got my attention. He basically went on to describe a nearly identical experience to mine. All of a sudden, the memories of the experience came rushing back to me. I could see everything I had experienced once again and that feeling of love washed over me.

I was so overwhelmed, I sent the Youtuber a message to see if he would talk to me more in depth about his experience. I never heard from him, so I started doing research in the internet to see if I could find others that had similar experiences. I came across a few others who had NDEs with similar experiences. I think it was at that point that I accepted that I must have also had a NDE and that the things that I experienced were real.

After this acceptance, I began feeling a drive for life. I quit smoking and drinking. I just passed a year in October. I began seeking more spiritual knowledge and I opened myself up to the universe more and things in my life began to change. I was at peace for the first time in a very long time. I understood that the spirit is our true nature and that these earthly lives were given to us as a sort of vacation from the all-knowing nature of our true-spirit selves. We should live these lives with fervor and with as little stress as possible. The more I open myself up to that still nature, the more balance I achieve in this physical life.

Now that I feel that I have purpose in this world, I have gotten healthier and even started my own business. I no longer have suicidal thoughts. I try to be a more open, understanding person. The NDE was truly the best thing that ever happened to me and I am thankful for the gift.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 02-14-2017

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related. Drug or medication overdose Life threatening event, but not clinical death. I had just gone through a second surgical procedure to fix the leaking of bile into my abdomen, but I think the event was caused by an overdose of pain medication.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. I felt like I had knowledge and understanding of all things.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? As I began seeing the lights, I became fully alert and conscious.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Time had lost all meaning

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. All the senses seemed to be working as one. I had a feeling of all understanding. It was almost like senses weren't needed, because I just knew things.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I had a feeling of all understanding. It was almost like senses weren't needed, because I just knew things.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I passed through what was like levels of knowledge and knowing. Each realm was met with a symbol that looked like sacred geometry

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes That was the first thing I was aware of. I was seeing many different colors of light. It was a truly beautiful experience.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. After passing through the geometrical veils, I entered into a place of stillness that looked like outer space.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? LOVE

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe. I was given knowledge and understanding of all things

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Agnostic I was raised Pentecostal. However, at the time, I was closer to atheist than even agnostic. I was only holding on to the slightest sliver of religious belief.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I am more open religious experiences. I study religion and practice meditation.

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths. After the event, I began studying pretty much all religions, just trying to find out what I had experienced. I have found that I relate most to Buddhism than any other religion, but also believe that most are speaking of the same being.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. At that point in life, I was pretty much atheist. I relied on scientific method for explanations to life. The experience was more connected to mythical and religious explanations of life after death. Although, I do believe that quantum physics is possibly knocking at the door of some of these experiences.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I changed from an atheist to a believer.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. The being I encountered was pure love. It was like being cradled in the softest blanket ever.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain It was like having the understanding that all the religious writings were just describing the same being.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Everything was as one.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain I felt aware of a being, but it seemed like everything was connected to everything else. I guess in that sense, we are all god?

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I felt like I had all knowledge. Everything was as it should be and perfect.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists. I felt like it was home. It also seemed very familiar.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Overwhelming feeling of love. I cannot express this enough.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life. I have had a 180-degree flip in my views. I sometimes allow earthly life to slip back in and worry me, but I'm usually quickly reminded of the insignificance of the problems of this world.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I am much closer and honest to/with my family and friends. I would say I am truer to myself and others. Before, I was just giving a front.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes If I had the knowledge that was given to me at the time, I could probably express the experience very eloquently. But, not so much with limited human understanding of earth.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. I have tried to document the event in writing as much as possible to avoid false memories.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I was very reluctant to share this experience with anyone. I tried to find others to talk to on the internet. Eventually I opened up to some of my family and friends.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I had mostly heard of the generic NDE; white light, tunnel, dead family members.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably not real. I felt like something had changed in my life, but as the feeling and memory decayed, I passed it off more and more to just effects of the medications that I was on.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. Reading and hearing others describe very similar experiences has confirmed for me that the experience was real. That along with seeing the changes in my life give me even more confidence.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No