Ember C Probable NDE

Experience Description

I was 16 when I decided to take my own life through a drug overdose. My clinical depression and borderline personality disorder had spiraled out of control. I lay down on my bed, swallowed a bottle of pills, and felt my consciousness slip away.

I woke up in a place that felt like Oz. It was all vivid colors and sunshine. I tried to stand, but realized that my body wasn't with me. I couldn't see where I came from or where I was to go. I could see a field with an uncountable number of flowers and low, rolling hills. The field stretched further than I could see in every direction, except towards the sunset. There was a clear creek, like the ones I grew up near. The creek was winding its way towards the setting sun with the light reflecting off of it. The colors of the sky were scattered across the creek like billions of tiny gemstones. I walked to the creek and tried to run my fingers through it. But I couldn't feel anything. I inspected the flowers near the bed of the creek. While studying the tiny purple petals, I realized that I was meant to love. I knew in that moment that I was not going to die. I was to inspire the people I meet with the love. I closed my eyes.

When I opened them I was in a hospital. I never shared the experience, but now I am far more focused on empathy and understanding of others.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 12/20/2014

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drug or medication overdose. Life threatening event, but not clinical death. Suicide attempt

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. Colors were brighter and the world was made simpler

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When looking at the flower near the creek

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Colors were brighter

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Normal

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? Some unfamiliar and strange place. It seemed like Oz or Wonderland, with colors much brighter than on this plane of existance

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Love, peace

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Agnostic. Raised Christian but went away from that

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I have become more conscious of nature

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Slightly important to me

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. I did not believe in a supreme being, nor did I encounter one. I also felt as though nature had significance, which was seen in my NDE

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I feel as though nature plays a larger part in my life, and love has become my focus

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably does not exist

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? I am uncertain if God exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife probably exists No

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I slightly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I slightly fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Moderately fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are probably meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I felt as though the world lacked love and it was my new purpose to fix that

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I try to show love more to others than I used to, which strengthens all relationships

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes There was a sense as though I was an honored guest in someone else's home. I was welcome, but did not belong

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? No

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real. It felt real, but I couldn't understand being outside of my physical body

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably not real. It might have been a type of dream, and I was never pronounced dead so I doubt that my spirit left my body

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No