Haneefa M NDE

Experience Description

I remember being up near the ceiling of the hospital room and looking down at the doctor. He was leaning over my body in the hospital bed. He was shaking me and calling my name. Meanwhile, I had gradually faded away, feeling weaker and weaker.

Then I relaxed, as if going off to sleep, but was still awake. The pain in my belly and my headache were gone. In the darkness, I felt an incredible sense of peace, love and acceptance. I don’t remember the source of this love and peace or what else happened.

I do remember waking up in the hospital bed. I was hearing, 'What have I been doing with my life? What have I been doing with my life? What have I been doing with my life?' repeated over and over, in my head. My husband was called in to sign papers for emergency surgery to find out why my blood count kept going so low and discover why my belly was swollen. I was in and out of consciousness before and after surgery. During this time, I also saw some frightening scenes that a few years later came true.

The doctor told me I had an ectopic pregnancy. This means that instead of the fetus being in my womb, it was growing in my tiny, left fallopian tube and ovary. The three-month size fetus burst through the fallopian tube causing internal bleeding requiring over 7 pints of blood to stabilize me.

I didn’t know I had died because the doctors didn’t tell me. I didn’t know what an NDE was. I just knew that I was grateful to be alive. Not only could have died from blood loss, I could have died from sepsis from an infected surgical wound, a kidney infection, and pneumonia. It was three weeks before I was discharged from the hospital.

After I was home and recovered, I returned to nursing school as a changed person. 'What have I been doing with my life?' still replayed in my head. I wasn’t a bad person doing a lot of sinful things. I was doing what was expected of a 26 year-old married woman. Sure, I tried a few things, but I didn’t like it, so these never stuck with me as habits. I probably did have a life review that I don’t remember. It must have challenged me to do more with my life. Previously I was shy. I became more social; acquired new friends and activities outside my home.

My change in attitude and newly acquired psychic abilities scared me. I prayed for understanding and relief from knowing about events before they happened; plus feeling other people’s emotional and physical pain. Eight years later my prayers were answered when I found the book, 'Heading Towards Omega,' by Kenneth Ring at a used bookstore. I was comforted as I learned about other’s stories of aftereffects, changes in worldview and values, and seeing the future.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: January 2, 1982

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Ectopic pregnancy Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function) no outside event other than seriously ill with internal bleeding.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness. Only my emotional feelings were heightened.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? when I was on the ceiling looking down on my body

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Time seemed to go faster or slower than usual. Perhaps slowed down in order for me to have experienced a feeling of peace and a life review in that short time before my doctor brought me back.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. A field of brightly colored glowing flowers, mostly red. And another frightening nighttime scene that seemed very real.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don’t remember hearing anything in particular during the NDE.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt love, peaceful, and safe; a peace that I’ve never had before.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No. None specific that I remember, but must have been shown scenes from the past because I woke up asking myself, 'What have I been doing with my life?'

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future. Yes, a scene where I was terrified being chased, but I wasn’t aware during the NDE, that it would come true in my future.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Muslim

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I gradually let go of the need for rules and rituals, or relying on a religious leader to tell me what to do. The universe provides guidance and abundance.

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths Indigenous

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. Love and acceptance instead of being judged

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I no longer was materialistic, comparing myself to others and contemplating what to buy next.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Just love is the most important

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life. I went from shy to social, spontaneous, knowing about the future, even knowing what happened in the next few minutes, what people were thinking, knowing what was happening in other parts of the United States or the world, animal communication, and what I need just appears.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? I lost friends and acquaintances because I no longer was materialistic, comparing myself to others and contemplating what to buy next. Yes, especially with my husband. He didn’t know what to do with the new me. We divorced.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes My NDE was mostly feelings and knowing. I didn’t see anything special around me. I just knew that I was somewhere else.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience less accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. I remember the hospital events more than my NDE.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes, knowing about the future, even knowing what happened in the next few minutes, what people were thinking, knowing what was happening in other parts of the United States or the world, animal communication, and what I need just appears.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I didn’t share for years because I was coping with grieving at the same time as remembering the bliss.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real. The feeling of peace and blessed continued for approximately a year afterwards, giving me some comfort between episodes of crying, depression grieving my baby dying.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. I definitely believe my NDE was real, mostly because of how my life has continued to change positively in spite of major life crises, the faith, trust and comfort that’s there. I don’t have a lot of fear and anxiety.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes personal meditation and group meditations rituals, and mediumship gives me feelings of peace, love and along with visions of the fields of flowers. I’ve painted pictures trying to capture the beauty of the flowers.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? No. I'm tired now. This took longer than 45 minutes

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? you can still have benefits of an NDE, even if don’t remember all of the details. Perhaps more questions about the aftereffects and coping afterwards

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