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I was on the operating table and noticed that my heart rate on the monitor changed to V-Tach. Suddenly I was sucked out of my body like a vacuum and saw the anesthesiologist calling my doctor who I saw in the parking garage. I saw that I was lying on the operating table, and then my body left the hospital and went into the universe, travelling very fast through space. I landed in a very cloudy place and the people I saw gathering around me were my dead patients that I had seen die when I worked in the intensive care unit. I thought to myself that I surely had died, for these people were dead. Then suddenly I saw my father who had died six months prior and he talked to me through my brain and led me to a tunnel. Before I approached the tunnel I was engulfed in a large ray of light, a light that was so beautiful and comforting and I felt unconditional love.While in the light I had a life review and saw everything I had ever done in my life, every thought, word, deed, action, inaction was shown to me. Then my father led me into this rotating tunnel, where at the end was a very beautiful garden. In the middle of the tunnel was a figure, who had his back to me. I was immediately thrown to my knees as my father stood next to me. My immediate thoughts moved to the Old Testament, where the Levites were attending the Arc of the Covenant, where the holy of holiness resided. I felt as if I were in this place and if the figure, who I thought was Jesus, turned around I would surely die. I heard three voices speak to me in unison. They said, 'You can stay or you can leave.' I remember when I heard this, I thought, 'I can stay or I can leave?' A part of me wanted to stay, yet another part of me wanted to leave. For I loved my father and he was next to me and I wanted to stay with him. I replied back to the voices, 'But I am not good enough to be here.' The most beautiful voice said to me, 'Oh, but you are.' I remember I was so humbled by this that even now when I think of it I cry. I kept trying to decide what to do, but could not make a decision.Suddenly, I felt a pulling on my shoulders as if something was pulling me back, and it was revealed to me that the pulling was the prayers of my mother and my children. I immediately, said, 'I gotta go,' and I shot out of that tunnel so fast, hearing like a vacuum sound. I shot back through the universe and awoke looking at the doctor who told me that I was going to die. I told the doctor that I had been in heaven and that I was not going to die. When I saw my mother, I immediately started to cry and told her that I had seen my father. I ended up having five surgeries that year and survived.
Background Information:
Gender: Female
Date NDE Occurred: Feb 1997 NDE Elements:
At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) I had a respiratory and cardiac arrest on the operating table.
How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed
The experience included: Out of body experience
Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I was alert throughout the entire ordeal.
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I was alert throughout the entire ordeal.
Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast
Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I felt I was in that place for a long time.
Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I wear contact lens and I was able to see exceptionally well without them.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing seemed very acute.
Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out
Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I got into the middle of the tunnel.
The experience included: Presence of deceased persons
Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I felt I was in heaven with my dad and my dead patients.
The experience included: Light
Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I stood in the light.
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I saw a beautiful garden beyond the tunnel I was in.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt myself leave my body, and soar through the universe very fast, yet my body was on the operating table, for my spirit hovered over the table.
Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness
Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy
Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world
The experience included: Special Knowledge
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe
The experience included: Life review
Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I saw my entire life flash before me like a motion picture movie; I saw everything that I ever did - every thought, action, belief, inaction.
The experience included: Vision of the future
Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future In my recovery, I have had visions that have come true. I have seen dead people.
Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will God, Spiritual and Religion:
What was your religion prior to your experience? Moderate
Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I know there is a God now.
What is your religion now? Liberal 'Have a belief in a higher power, God'
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I know there is a God now.
The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:
During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I learned that the reason for life is to love and be loved without measure.
Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I have more compassion, love and understanding and I know that I am different because of this experience. After the NDE:
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes For a time it was hard to discuss, for I thought I was crazy.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can read minds, my hands grow hot and can help others, I can see what is wrong with a person then I touch them. I have had visions that have come true. I have had premonitions that have come true. I have the ability to help people and animals and I can understand what animals have to say to me. I have problems with watches, they stop after I wear them for a week; I have a drawer full of watches that do not work. I have been locked inside of my car numerous times, where I have had to climb out of the window. I have set off car alarms when I am agitated, I have gone through six vacuum cleaners that usually break down in a month after I have used them. We went through four microwave ovens in several years. I used to work next to a copy machine that broke down so much that they had to replace it, and it had been new. Then it happened to another copy machine until they moved it away from me. I had a new car that stopped working and I was asked if I drove in snow, because my car froze, and it was in the spring with seventy degree temperatures.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I believe what I experienced is true, for my life has forever been changed by this experience. I am not the same, nor have I ever experienced the kind of love I felt in that light and I know that there is life beyond this one, completely.
Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared this immediately with my family and my doctor. I think they were shocked, but as time has gone on, they understand me and love me for what I am.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I am a nurse and patients had told me that they had these experiences, but I felt skeptical about believing them.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I knew I was changed forever because of that experience.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was real, because I can still remember every detail of it in full recall.
At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It was real, it happened, it changed me and I am forever different because of it.
Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? It was good, thanks for letting me vent.
A day before my NDE, I went to see my doctor, because I was having problems sitting. When he examined my rectum, he found a very large abscess. I was immediately sent to a surgeon who scheduled me to have an operation the following day. That night, as I was lying in bed, I felt my spirit leave my body and I could see myself lying on the bed. The experience scared me so I tried to rouse my husband, but he did not wake.
The next day, I was in my bathroom giving myself enemas in preparation for my rectal surgery and I noticed blood in the toilet. As I got up, I became very tachycardia [Tachycardia is a heart rate that exceeds the normal range] and very fearful, for I felt like my body was dying. I got very short of breath and I knew I was going to die. I started to pray because I didn't want my children to find me dead in the bathroom, and then I felt this sensation come over me, as though, if I just let go, I could die, and I felt very much at peace. Even so, I decided I would not give in and I thought if I lay in the bathtub, I could relax and not get so excited. So I got into the bathtub and as I was lying there, I felt my spirit, once again, leave my body and I could see myself sitting in the tub. This, again, really freaked me out and I climbed out of the tub, because I didn't want my children to find me dead in the tub. I crawled to the phone and called my neighbor and asked her to please come over and help me get dressed. She came over and I was weak but I felt okay, so I walked downstairs, with her help.
Next, my father-in-law came over to take me to have my surgery. When I was in the Outpatient Surgery Center, they attempted to start me on an intravenous drip, but were having difficulty doing so. Then they put a blood pressure cuff on my arm, however it would not register. I laughed and told the nurse it must be some malfunction. When the anesthesiologist came in, I had this need to tell him to not let me die. I remember he looked at me like I was crazy. I was taken into the operating room and as they put the monitor on me, I saw the heart rhythm V-Tach [Ventricular tachycardia is a fast heart rhythm, originating in one of the ventricles of the heart, and is a potentially life-threatening arrhythmia]. I then looked at the blood pressure monitor and saw my blood pressure was 40 and dropping. The anesthesiologist became very upset and started to run around the room, then all of a sudden, my spirit left my body, and it felt like I was sucked out of my body like a vacuum.
My spirit soared out of the hospital and into the universe. I mean it felt like "Star Trek"! My spirit was traveling very fast and I saw the earth below me and I seemed to be amidst the stars. Then I heard a "thump" and I landed in this very cloudy place, and the people I saw were all dead people whom I, as a nurse, had once cared for. They welcomed me and were all smiling. They parted, and coming towards me was my father who had died six months prior. I remember how happy I was because I loved my dad so much and he had died. My father smiled at me and held my hand and led me to a tunnel.
The tunnel seemed to move slowly back and forth, and when I arrived in front of it, a bright light shone upon me and I felt no pain, and this incredible love that radiated inside of me. I walked into the tunnel and standing in the middle of the tunnel was a figure dressed in white with long hair, and his back was to me. I felt incredible love coming from this person and I just knew that if he turned and looked at me, I would be dead. Beyond this man, was an incredible place. The colors were interactive and alive. It seemed like a paradise, except the colors were alive and the rocks and sky and grass and water all seemed to be so very beautiful and they seem to all interact with each other.
I saw my life flash before me like a rapid motion picture movie, and I saw all the good things and all the bad things that I had done in my entire life. Then, I heard three voices. They said, “You can stay or you can leave". And I thought to myself, I can stay or I can leave? And I said, "I am not good enough to be here", and the voices said, "Oh, but you are". The voices were so tender and the thought of staying seemed so pleasing to me, and I wanted to stay with my dad, but I suddenly felt this tugging at my shoulders. It seemed to be pulling at me, and I knew instantly that it was the prayers of my family, my children... and immediately I said, "I gotta go!”.
In that moment, I shot out of that tunnel, and soared through the universe. I heard a "thump" and I was back in my body. And leaning over me was my doctor who said, "Anne, why didn't you tell me you were so sick? You had a cardiac arrest, we resuscitated you and performed your surgery without anesthesia, but you are probably going to die, for you are in septic shock. And I replied, "Oh no, doctor. I was in heaven and I got to come back, so I won't die".
I was very sick for six months and had a total of five surgeries and I got septic many times, but I survived.Background Information:Gender: FemaleDate NDE Occurred: February 1997NDE Elements:At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes IllnessSurgery-related Clinical death I had a cardiac arrest on the operating table and was told after my NDE that I would die, for I was in septic shock, but I didn't die, I lived.How do you consider the content of your experience? MixedThe experience included: Out of body experienceDid you feel separated from your body? Yes I felt my spirit was separate from my body, for it was my spirit that left my body.At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I felt very alert.Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I felt I was in another dimension. I felt I was in heaven.Did your hearing differ in any way from normal? I just heard the "thumps" of my spirit leaving and entering my body. I heard the three voices in the tunnel and all else seemed through mental telepathy.Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I got into the middle of the tunnel only then when I chose to come back to earth, I left immediately.The experience included: Presence of deceased personsDid you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I saw all these dead patients I had cared for in my life as a nurse, and I saw my dad who had died, and I saw the being in the middle of the tunnel, who I perceived as Jesus.The experience included: LightDid you see an unearthly light? Yes I saw a light in front of the tunnel, it was much like a giant spotlight, that took all pain away, and gave pure love.Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I saw paradise on the other side of the tunnel, the most beautiful place.What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was at first afraid, but then elated and comforted.The experience included: Special KnowledgeDid you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I felt I found the secret of the universe, which is to love beyond reach and measure.The experience included: Life reviewDid scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I saw my entire life flash before me, all good and bad experiences. I learned that we must love above all things in this life. And our actions are accountable by our minute-to-minute responses to one another and that our lives are so very interdependent upon one another and one life is very important in the cycle of life. I learned that suicide is the unpardonable sin against humanity for life is so very special, to be revered, and should not be taken for granted. Suffering is needed for higher attainment, and that above all things we are here on earth to love and be loved. I learned that a simple smile, a kind word or acknowledgement can change the course of person's life. I was given a gift of insight, visions, and spiritual awareness of what the universe is made of.Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future I was made aware that I would survive this ordeal.Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will I was given a choice to stay or leave, and I felt the pulling of my family to come back to my body, so I chose to leave.God, Spiritual and Religion:What was your religion prior to your experience? Conservative/fundamentalist What is your religion now? Liberal Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes My entire perception about life has changed for the positive.The experience included: Presence of unearthly beingsAfter the NDE:Was the experience difficult to express in words? No Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can read the thoughts of others sometimes, I can see inside others - good and bad. I have found that the electrical conductivity of my body has changed; if I am very upset I have been locked inside my car, copy machines have gone haywire. I cannot wear watches for long periods of time for they stop. I have had visions that have come true. I can communicate sometimes with people who have died. I have discernment. At first, I would get very agitated being around crowds, for their energy would agitate and upset me.Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Best part that I know life exists after death, worst part is I am different now, and sometimes I feel rather alone, like I do not fit in.Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes After my experience, many people came into my room to hear about this experience, and many said they were profoundly changed. Some are skeptical. Some people have a deeper commitment to loving others.At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It really happened and I am forever changed.
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