Janine S NDE

Experience Description

I was three years on a warm, summer evening. My pink bounce ball had rolled off the pier and into the water. I walked off the pier after my ball. No one was around watching me. I remember standing on the floor of the ocean with the water above my head. I wasn’t afraid.

Then, I was standing above the water watching myself lying on the beach and seeing my parents and other members of my family kneeling over me. They were upset as they were trying to save my life. As I was watching, I realized there was someone beside me. This figure was much taller than me and taller than the average person. The figure felt older and more intelligent than me. I never turned to look at the figure. This figure felt like a guide more than like a family member. It was like we both belonged where we were and we both felt the same way about my family. I felt like I was a higher intelligence who knew more than a 3 year old would know. I felt like this was the real me and I was where I really came from.

I know I didn’t want to go back into my body. I felt nothing for those people on the beach. I knew they loved me and were scared. I felt I didn’t belong with them and that their existence was confusing, complicated, and much less than my true existence. They didn’t have the knowledge that I had. I knew where I was standing was real as it felt like home. Both, myself and the figure next to me, had a greater awareness and consciousness than my family by my earthly body. I was completely in the moment.

I felt as if I had an understanding of everything. I wasn’t afraid but I knew I didn’t want to go back to my body. I didn’t look at my parents like they were my mom and dad. I looked at them like I didn’t belong with them because I was not one of them. There was a moment when I realized I was going to go back and I felt that the figure was there to give me the understanding that I needed to go back. Then, I heard a very loud clap, like a crack of thunder.

I was back in my body and surrounded by my family. I was coughing up water and shaking violently. I was wet, cold, and crying as I sought the safety of my family.

I didn’t think about what had happened until much later. I do remember for many years afterwards that whenever my siblings were bullying me, I would go to my room, cry, and say aloud 'I want to come home. Why won’t you let me come home? I don’t want to stay here.' I would fall asleep and wake up feeling fine. Eventually all that stopped. But I never forgot that experience. I remember it so clearly, even today. I can still hear the clap and remember how it felt being with the figure beside me. Sometimes I wonder why I didn’t see a bright light, feel warm, or have joyful feelings.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 1969

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident. Drowning. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function)

How do you consider the content of your experience? Neither pleasant NOR distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. I felt everything that a 3 year would never be able to comprehend.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Immediately

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Time didn’t matter as I didn’t seem rushed or slowed. There was just a understanding that time didn’t matter.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Although I could see my family, I also actually felt them. I felt their confusion and panic. I didn’t feel sorry for them; but I felt pity for them because my existence was not comparable to theirs and they didn’t even know it.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It wasn’t a matter of hearing, but rather, it was a matter of feeling.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It was a totally different existence. I was in a different realm.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt belonging, a certain type of peace, and pity.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe. I understood everything about myself, others and the existence of all.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic. I was 3 years old, so I had no real concept of religion

What is your religion now? Other: Lapsed Catholic

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. I was three years old, so at the time I don’t remember having any beliefs.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I feel like I was a part of something not experienced by many people.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. There was a figure beside me that felt like a Being from the same place.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain. I felt I always existed but not as another person.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I felt that there was a unity and knowledge that everyone had on the other side.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I felt knowledgeable of where I was and that it was real and true. Earthly pain and trouble did not exist here.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes. I knew that my existence was true, real and complete.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes I felt the that life on earth was painful, troubled, full of unhappiness, and that it was a struggle. There was always one difficulty after another while they tried to avoid or manage one hardship after another.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life. I’m not quite sure. I was 3 years old. I do feel a sense that I was given a gift to have my experience, but I’m not quite sure what it all meant.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. When I remember my experience, it’s still the same. It is clear and I remember everything the same. I’ve told others about my experience and the feelings and words to describe it have never changed.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain There have been times when I have a feeling of something going to happen before it happens. I have a good read of people. I have a uncanny sense of where to find things if they’re missing.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Knowing that I belonged there in a place with no pain, confusion, or complications.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes It happened when I was three. I started to share the experience around the time I became a teenager.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I knew something had happened other than just drowning.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. How could I remember something like this if it didn’t happen? I was 3 years old but I still remember it all.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Yes