Jay G SDE

Experience Description

It was January 1985. My mother, Ethel, was feeling very weak. She visited her doctor who said her heartbeat had become irregular. He told her she should be admitted immediately to the hospital. At the hospital, the doctor told her that she needed a pacemaker. After receiving the pacemaker, she seemed well. They said they wanted to monitor her for a day or two before releasing her from the hospital.

The second night she was in the hospital, I received a call from one of the doctors at about 3 AM. He said that she had had a difficult night and was not doing well. He told me to the hospital immediately.

When I got to her room, one of the doctors said they almost lost her earlier but she was doing better. I went to her bedside. She was on a ventilator, seemed in distress, and could not speak to me. She was in and out of consciousness but clearly upset when she was awake. An alarm went off and the doctor and a nurse went to my mother’s bedside and began giving her CPR. As they worked on her, classical music played in the background. I do not recall a radio being in the room, but I recall thinking that the doctor must have put that music on to keep him relaxed while he was giving CPR.

As I stood there watching, I saw a shadow slowly rise up from my mother’s body; a shadow that was clearly her. In the shadow, she was still in a hospital gown. Her face and body were quite clear. She appeared to look down at the scene of the doctor and nurse working on her body and me standing nearby. On her face, she had an expression of total shock and confusion, as if she was trying to understand what was happening.

After a while, the shadow seemed to return to her body. I assumed the doctor and nurse saw her image rise up as well, and would explain this phenomenon to me when they finished giving CPR. However, they never said a word about it. If they did see it, they didn’t say. I never asked about it. My mother died a few hours later.

I have been haunted by this experience my entire life. Was it my imagination? What happened that night? What I witnessed seemed quite clear to me at the time. I was quite awake and it seemed more than real. I think about this experience often, even to this day. I often search to see if others have had similar experiences. It is only because of the internet that I have learned about the concept of Shared Death Experiences. I believe that this experience was an SDE. I have never had another experience like this.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: January 1985

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Other: Shared Near Death Experience

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No No

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness. Normal

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I felt that I was fully alert throughout this experience.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. same

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. same

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Very upset.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? No

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Jewish

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Jewish

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. I had never experienced anything like this before or since. I was totally shocked. It was so very clear to me that I was expecting the doctor or nurse to explain to me why I had seen it. I actually expected them to explain the phenomenon to me. When they didn't say a word about it, neither did I.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. I saw my mother's spirit rising out of her body and looking down at the scene. She seemed as if she was shocked at what she was seeing.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes I had never experienced anything like this before and have not experienced anything like it since.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I saw my mother's spirit rise up from the hospital bed and look down at the scene as the doctor and nurse were attending to her. It was very clear and she was wearing the hospital gown that she had on.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? No changes in my life. It has changed my view of an afterlife.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes How do I explain this without sounding as if it is a fabrication?

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. It remains crystal clear in my memory.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I believe what I was most shocked by was that I was apparently the only person who saw my mother's spirit. At the time, I was convinced it was a phenomenon that everyone who was in the room saw it.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Immediate. I was surprised by their reactions. I was expected them to say I had hallucinated. They did not seem at all surprised and essentially said either overly or tacitly 'yes, that happens'.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

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