Joan S FDE

Experience Description

I had been on a trip to Hawaii for a couple months, waiting for my sister to arrive. I was camping out on the beaches. I was asleep in my pup tent which is a small, single person tent. One night, I heard footsteps in the sand just outside my tent. The movement stopped and I knew someone was standing there. I struggled to wake-up from my sound sleep and be alert as fast as possible.

After a long silence, a man’s voice asked, ‘Hey man, what time is it?’ Something wasn't right, so I answered back in the deepest voice I could, so I might sound like a man, ‘I don't know man.’ I was waiting to hear footsteps of the man walking away, but I didn't. It was very quiet for what seemed to be a long time and I continued to try to become fully awake and aware, as I laid there in silence.

Suddenly the man burst into my tent through the small opening at my feet! I thrashed, hit, and kicked with all the energy I had! He backed out of the tent yelling at me, ‘Cut it out!’ and ‘What are you doing?’ I made my way out of the tent right behind him. When we were out of the tent that had collapsed around us, I was relieved to be out of it and in the open. But I was scared of who this man was and what his intentions were. My mind and heart were racing. I responded to his question, ‘What are You doing?’ He said, ‘I just want to talk.’ We were both sitting in the sand and he was only a few feet away from me. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my legs. I looked up at the beach to my left, which was the side where he was sitting. I looked down the beach to my right. The nearest campers were too far away for me to run to, without being caught if he were to chase me.

I was considering yelling for help when I felt myself falling backwards and everything went white then black. When I came to, the man was on top of me with his hand over my mouth. He told me, ‘Shut up, I have a knife.’ I felt him prick my face with the knife and at that moment, I believed that he was going to kill me! The thought of him slicing my face was so frightening, and the fear of experiencing that, led me to accepting death before it even happened!!

Moments after these thoughts, I was up in the sky, maybe about 20 or 30 feet high. I was looking down on this man who was on top of my body. I was aware that I had no body, but I could see, just as though I had eyes. If I had a body, I would have been floating flat on my stomach, looking straight downward. I looked to my right, as though I had turned my head; I saw that I was on a plane of some sort. There was a layer of darkness above me, an invisible layer below me between myself and the earth, and an open area out to the right side, which was light. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to go there or not.

I looked back down, where the man was on top of my body, and suddenly felt a very strong feeling of injustice and wrong doing! I felt anger at what he was doing! The next thing I knew, I was back in my body, underneath this man. I tried to speak, but his hand was on my mouth and he told me to shut up. I was always quite shy and not particularly confident, so what happened next, was quite a surprise. I began whispering beneath his hand to let him know I was not going to yell or scream, and he removed his hand.

I continued to whisper and words poured out of my mouth. I spoke to him about injustice, cruelty, and about how wrong it is to do what he did, and why and how he should be loving instead. I wish I had written down all that I had told him that night, because I believe they were literally words from God and not my own. The man sat up, pulled me to him and hugged me. He told me he was sorry. He said, ‘You need help.’

At that time, I hadn't realized that he had hit me on the back of my head with a large rock and that I was bleeding pretty badly from the wound. He stood up, picked me up, and carried me down to the edge of the ocean and told me to wash off my head. I did so, all the while wondering what he was going to do next. When my head was wet with salt water he picked me up and carried me across the beach and up a hill to a parking area where Hawaiians and visitors would camp. The man approached a Hawaiian man, who was camping with his family.

He woke the Hawaiian and told him, ‘My girlfriend is hurt, she needs help.’ The Hawaiian let us ride in the back of his pick-up as he drove us into the nearest town, which was Lahaina, about 14 miles away. On the long drive to town, I leaned against my attacker and hoped he continued to feel the need to help me instead of realize he might get in trouble for what he had done. I was afraid that he might change his mind and throw me out of the truck. We arrived at Lahina Hospital but since it was around 2 or 3 in the morning, the hospital was closed! I never knew hospitals close!

We climbed out of the truck and walked up to the front doors. I turned and sat on the cement and leaned up against the glass door. I was extremely scared to be alone with this man again so as the Hawaiian started driving off he glanced over at me. When I caught his eye, I stared as intently and longingly at him as I possibly could in order that he might see my fear. Apparently he did, because a short time later the Police pulled up and began talking to my attacker. A

s they were talking, a doctor showed up and opened the hospital door. As soon as the door closed behind us, I told her what had happened, as fast as I could. I made it clear that I was not this man's girlfriend. She went outside and told the Police who then took the man in for questioning. The doctor stitched up my head and sprayed it with something that became a plastic Band-Aid of sorts to protect the wound. When the doctor had finished, a policeman drove me to the police station and questioned me.

He told me that the man, who had attacked me, had been with a buddy earlier that evening and his buddy had raped a girl on a different beach. He asked me if I wanted to press charges. I asked what that involved and he explained that the process could take several months. Because I was on vacation, I knew I did not really want to stay in Hawaii for that long and most importantly, I felt like my attacker truly heard God's message through me, that night. Because he helped me and did not rape me, I felt he 'got it'. I hoped he may have been changed forever and I declined to press charges.

When the police were finished, they sent me on my way. They did not offer to give me a ride back to my campsite. My hair was tangled with dried salt water, I had a gash on my head that was exposed beneath a clear, sprayed-on, plastic Band-Aid, and my shirt was covered in dried blood and salt water. The sun was just rising and I had to walk down the highway and hitchhike back to my campsite, alone after a rape attempt was just made on me a few hours before.

As I walked down the highway though, I thought about the miracle I had experienced when I left my body. I looked up and could hardly believe I had been floating above the earth just a few hours before!! I realized I had been given a special gift that night. I felt like I was the only person in the world who knew for sure: there was life after death.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: July 1974

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Criminal attack. Direct head injury. Other: I was hit on the head with a rock and briefly knocked out. When I came to, I was restrained with a knife held on my cheek. I 'believed' I was going to die from the attacker stabbing me. The injury itself was not necessarily life threatening. Had been hit on the back of my head with a rock and held at knife-point by a man who had intended to rape me.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Tunnel

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I didn't hear anything because there was nothing to hear, but I definitely saw the perpetrator on top of me and I knew that there was an assault occurring. What I saw, is exactly what was happening. When I was back in my body, he was still there. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal The passion I felt was strong. The words I spoke were very wise and unlike anything, I had ever thought or said. Even though the words I spoke were after I was back in my body, I feel that they were a direct result of having been in that altered state with no body.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I noticed the injustice and wrong-doing that the man was carrying out on another person.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No I was not particularly aware of time, but in retrospect, I would say it probably lost all meaning.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I didn't notice that it was different, other than the fact that I was seeing, yet I had no body or eyes with which to see.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I didn't notice any difference. There really was no conversation to be heard. The ocean would have been the only sound, and I don't remember noticing it.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes The level I was on could be described as a tunnel. I was aware of a 'layer' below and above me that felt flat and/or parallel to each other. It was just a feeling that there was something like a fog there, creating a top and bottom. There didn't seem to be any 'sides', just darkness. There was a feeling that I could only move one way, in the direction toward the light, which was to my right. (I never looked the other way, to my left, so I don't know what was there).

The experience included: Darkness

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes When I turned to the right, there was light quite a ways off: maybe 300 yards or so away. I was thinking of going there, but looked back down to earth instead.

The experience included: Void

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm Floating above the earth without a body, and still being intelligent and aware was definitely unfamiliar, strange and unearthly.

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt anger at the injustice and atrocities with which people are capable. I felt Love that people should be feeling toward one another. I also felt a lack of fear to be able to speak to him.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? No

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe During the experience, I clearly realized the importance and value of the way human beings are fundamentally supposed to treat one another. After the experience was over and I was hitchhiking back to my campsite, I realized I had just experienced something, which most others are completely unaware. I felt like it was a gift from God. Because of the experience, I know that we all have the capacity to choose to 'let go' and move on to whatever is beyond this worldly life. If someone is suffering, they have the ability to die instead of endure the pain. I know for sure that there is life after death and that our souls continue.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

The experience included: Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes The boundaries I felt were more a 'sense' of a level below me (somehow keeping me at the height I was at in the sky), and the sense of a level plane or ceiling above me (which created a tunnel effect).

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will After looking at the light and looking back at what was happening on earth, I knew that I was supposed to talk to my attacker and 'teach' him what is 'right' and also about 'love'.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Moderately important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Other Christian Had been to Christian Science sunday school for a short time as a child. Believed in God and strived to be a 'good' person.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Other Christian Christian - Believe the Bible

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I had not heard of, nor ever had an out of body experience before it happened. I had never spoken to anyone in the manner that I did during the experience, where it seemed as though the words coming out of my mouth, were not my own. I did not have an opinion as to whether there was life after death before the experience, but knew for sure that there is life after death, after the experience. I did believe in God before and after the experience.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I felt more strongly that we are all to behave in a respectful, kind way toward one another. I feel more confidence in my views of what is right and wrong. I feel that it is important to do whatever is needed to help another person to understand right from wrong if a chance arises.

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes If our spirits/souls continue on beyond our earthly lives, it makes perfect sense that there is so much more that we know nothing about and it makes sense to me that everything is connected to one God. There is so much more to this picture of life in the

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God definitely exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes The intense knowledge and truth about 'right and wrong' poured into my mind and I was able to communicate that knowledge clearly and directly to my attacker in a manner that I never could have done prior to this experience. It felt as though the words that came out of my mouth were Gods words speaking through me.

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I suddenly knew all variables of right from wrong so clearly, and knew that I was supposed to give my attacker the message that he was to love, instead of be selfish and hurtful.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes We are suppose to 'love' one another.

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes Being completely conscious and aware, yet without a body was clearly evidence that life continues after the body dies.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Slightly fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes We are not suppose to hurt each other, but be helpful and love each other.

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes We are suppose to love one another.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life Moderate changes in my life. Because of the attack, I felt that I needed to be less independent and more dependent on relationships with other people for survival. The near death experience made me more confident that there is so much more to our lives, which endures beyond our life here on earth, subsequently, which has made me desire to work harder at doing God's will. Mostly I came away with a comforting and unwavering belief that our souls leave our bodies and we will continue on past this lifetime on earth.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No Uncertain I began to be a little more involved with people and a little less independent, probably mostly due to the assault.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes It is difficult to describe in words the visual of the ‘level’ I was on and the way it looked when I turned my head to look to the right. It would be easier to describe with a drawing.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience It was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I remembered it quite clearly for many years. Now that I am 59, I am having more trouble with my memory in general, and past events or details are not as clear.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Before the experience, I would have a strong sense of being watched, when someone was watching me. After the experience, my Mother and I would often feel when one of us was thinking about the other. We lived 500 miles from each other. Don't really know or think that this is necessarily related to the experience though.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The fact that I have first-hand knowledge that our souls leave our bodies and that we are completely whole without our bodies, is very significant and inspiring. The knowledge that our souls are going to continue on somehow, somewhere, after our bodies expire, is awesome and quite pleasant. Also, knowing that we can actually make the choice to pass-on is very nice, because if we are suffering, for whatever reason, we do not necessarily have to endure that pain.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I wrote my mother and sister a letter telling them what had happened, right away. They were worried for me and concerned about the assault and they both thought the out of body experience was quite amazing. I have told others, whenever an appropriate opportunity arose. I am proud to have experienced this and value it dearly. If an opportunity comes up where it is appropriate to share with others, I am always happy to do so. The inside knowledge that we can move-on if we're ever in a horrific position, and we choose to, is quite wonderful.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I absolutely knew it was real. I’ve never, ever had any reason to doubt that it was real. Because I was there and I know with all my heart, it happened.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I feel the same now as I did when it happened. I have never doubted that it was real. I did not have any reason to have imagined it. It was nothing like a dream. I know my body and my mind and I know what it feels like to imagine or dream of something. This was not imagined, it happened. I am a truthful person who values honesty. I have nothing to gain and no reason to lie about this experience. It was awesome and it was real!

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No