Jolie B NDE

Experience Description

I had just ended an abusive relationship, and I was in the process of moving back home. I felt so alone and depressed. I also felt ashamed of myself for allowing my life to end up the way it had. I felt like I had wasted the past four years of my life with a guy who never really loved me and who only wanted to control me. I lost the person I once was and had lost the trust of my family. I had turned my back on God as well. I was lying in my childhood bedroom since I had just gotten the last of my things moved in. I was also home alone.

I felt the sudden impulse to just end the pain and suffering. So I grabbed my car keys and swiped a bottle of my mother's mood stabilizer pills and drove away. I did not want to have my family find my dead body at home. As I was driving, I downed the bottle of pills. I kept driving and soon ended up in the countryside on the outskirts of town where I had not been before. I became drowsy and veered off the road. I began to panic and called my dad. He could tell I was on trouble. I didn't have the wits about me to explain what was happening. All he told me was to hang on and to get out of the truck so that someone could find me and take me to safety.

Then everything went black. I was calm despite having a sudden realization that I was dead. Through the darkness, out popped a bright light. The light gave me so much hope and joy. I believe it was God comforting me. It was like he was letting me know that I wasn't alone and that it wasn't my time to die.

I woke up in an ambulance on my way to the hospital. I asked them how they found me. They told me two men just happened to be driving by and they saw me lying on the side of the road. They picked me up and met the ambulance half way. I am now devoting my life to God because I believed he sent those men to save me. The doctor told me that with the amount of pills I swallowed I was lucky to have woken up at all. God gave me a second chance to better myself and to do right by him and my family, and I will not take it for granted this time.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: May 2014

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Suicide attempt. Life threatening event, but not clinical death

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I saw complete blackness, and then a bright ball of light, and then a complete wave of calmness washed over me. I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I was aware of my deepest thoughts and fears; I knew I was on the verge of death. Yet I sensed a divine presence I had never sensed before. As if, something was holding me in place in this world so that I did not slip away.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I lost consciousness, it was as if I began experiencing everything more intensely and clearly.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning I felt like time stopped because I thought I had died.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was sharper. I have bad vision, but I saw things more clearly.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing was sharper, as well.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

The experience included: Tunnel

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain I just saw a light through a vast sea of darkness and the light got closer and closer.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? An unusually bright light

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes It was a ball of light, which got bigger and bigger with each passing moment.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt calm, I felt safe. I no longer felt scared.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

The experience included: Special knowledge or purpose

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life I somehow knew that it was not my time to die and I simply awakened.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Atheist

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Christian- Jehovahs Witness

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience Before my experience, I was skeptical of God's existence. Now I fully believe in God.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I definitely believe in God. Also, I have more self-confidence, and I have a better relationship with my family.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? I was uncertain if God exists

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I believe it was God's presence within the light. God definitely exists.

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? God definitely exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I believe I was being comforted by the presence of God. An afterlife definitely exists.

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I slightly fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Greatly fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Not compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I felt God's love as I was staring deep into the light.

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life I am trying to make a greater effort in learning the bible.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I am a better person, and I am regaining the trust of my family.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes It was unimaginable. Something I had heard others talk about before but completely unfathomable to experience in person. The peaceful bliss is hard to describe. I had never been at peace with myself until I had this experience.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. I could not remember much leading up to the event or after the event but I remember everything during the event.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? No

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I know it’s real because it was as if the truth revealed itself right before my eyes.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No