Julia M NDE

Experience Description

The last moment of consciousness before the experience, was seeing the medical staff rolling my bed very fast through the corridors to bring me to the intensive care unit at the basement. As of this moment, I have no more notion of time nor place.

When my consciousness reappears, I am in a large tunnel that narrows in the distance. The walls of the tunnel are dark, like being padded and glossy, as if I am in a human intestine, which of course is very clean. I feel very good, weightless as if a power was softly pushing me at an indescribable speed so fast that I quickly arrive at the end of the tunnel, where a very white light is appearing and where I want to go.

I know that in this light will be happiness, love, and a complete well-being. The light grows more and more and very fast, and hop, here I am sitting at the edge of my tunnel. My legs dangling, at my back I feel the black tunnel and in front of me the soft white light encompassing me, warm, peaceful, not dazzling me. The light is giving me a complete well-being, which is the definition of universal love, the happiness that I was searching during my whole life. I am amazed!

I contemplate the softness of this light and hear a wonderful music that makes me perfectly happy, a kind of music that is so beautiful that it cannot exist on earth. Then at my left side, coming out from the core of the light, I first see human forms approaching slowly: men, women, children, young and old. They look at me with great kindness, as if they had a lot of love for me, and between themselves. They come to welcome me sympathetically so that I should join their group: they are smiling, calm, all wearing white. I look at them, as I want to see if I know them; in fact I am looking for my deceased father, my sister, and my grand-mother. I don't see them but the group passes me slowly, and I am a bit disappointed for not seeing my relatives. But I tell myself that they will for sure be arriving, while the people continue to pass by smiling at me, so I feel at peace.

Suddenly I see, at my right this time, some movement in the light. I look, and slowly coming out of the light is a being of light, I would say clad in light. He was tall, serene, and a man of light raising no fear in me. As for me, he conveys the fatherly safety that my father gave me. He speaks to me with a deep, but at the same time gentle voice, ‘It‘s not yet your moment, you still have a lot of things to do on earth!’. It's not a command, rather a statement, an evidence, a complete logic. I look at him; he is gentle like a father protecting you. I am disappointed, as I feel like going into the light. I am still sitting at the edge of my tunnel.

I had been waiting for my family to pass by, to jump in and stay there with them at this wonderful place, where everything is but love and softness. Then I turn towards the tunnel and hop, nothing anymore. I had another consciousness coming back. I was in my bed in the intensive care unit with my throat was hurting. I think to myself, 'I was intubated.'

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: janvier 2000

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related. CPR given 'Life threatening event, but not clinical death' Following a kidney surgery, drop in blood pressure that I saw going down to 5, I rang for the nurse, I saw them arrive running, then they got my bed to go to ICU, then I felt I was losing consciousness, then blackness.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No Since puberty, I have out of body experiences, at night when I sleep or when I take a nap on the sofa and I'm traveling, so I see things on earth, but in this NDE I saw nothing terrestrial. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal There was no more any doubt, no uncertainty. I was IN THE REAL LIFE, in a presence that could be infinite.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I was sitting on the edge of the tunnel in the light, listening to the music and looking at all those people passing, wearing white togas and in front of the being of light.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning From the beginning of the tunnel until coming out of it into the light, it happened as if it was at the speed of light. But afterwards, when I was sitting in the light, I no longer had any notion of time.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Much more into the distance.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Much better

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, but the facts have not been checked out

The experience included: Tunnel

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I suddenly found myself in a dark tunnel having a large diameter, where I was floating but I felt good and had no fear. Upon lifting my head I saw far, far in the deep of the tunnel, that was narrowing (much was due to the distance), an incandescent white light, where I wanted to go. I went there at an indescribable speed, as if being pushed by an 'invisible power' that was not touching me. As fast as the wish to go to the light appeared, I had already arrived in a wonderful world.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes Towards me came men, women, children of all ages; they came to welcome me. They came to look for me to come with them; they were smiling, calm, walked slowly, peacefully, happy, looked at me with kindness, but I didn't recognize anybody that I knew, neither dead nor alive. I didn't tell myself ‘they are dead’ but strangely enough I expected my father, my sister, my grandmother who died, to pass by to pick me up so I could join them. So it seems that I knew that I was ‘in the universe of the dead’.

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Coming out of the tunnel, I was in a white warm light, exactly matching my most convenient temperature, soft, wrapping me and I heard a marvelous music.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm When exiting the tunnel, it was as if being in the cosmos, in the universe that had no boundaries anymore. The only boundary was the tunnel where I was sitting; but I knew that if I would jump into the light I would be floating, as everything was in weightlessness, having no weight. I was in a world without borders, having no limits.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Total happiness and complete well-being

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I sensed a harmony, an osmosis with everything: the universe, the humans. As if all the humans, the nature were living together in love and peace without any problems, without conflicts, without either physical or psychological pain.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

The experience included: Awareness of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will When the being of light told me that it was not yet my moment, and that I still had things to do, I was (I don't know how long) disappointed for not being able to stay there with the deceased members of my family. I immediately believed and accepted what he said to me and I told myself ‘okay, I'm leaving and will come back when it will be the right moment’. Instantly, after formulating this in my mind, I left.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Greatly important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Buddhist j'ai été élevée simultanément dans la religion catholique et protestante;à 15 ans environ j'ai choisi la religion protestante, ensuite je n'ai plus pratiqué mais me suis informée sur toutes les religions et me suis fait mon propre mode de pensée que j'ai adapté dans le quotidien de ma vie et vers la quarantaine, en lisant des œuvres bouddhistes je me suis rendue compte que "je m'étais inventé ma religion bouddhiste et que je la pratiquais dans mon quotidien" car cela correspondait à ce que je voulais etre et ce que j'étais réellement

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Uncertain I'm not catholic; nevertheless, since this experience happened to me 13 years ago, I think that the catholic religion seized this being of light to name it God. As I saw a light being, having an aura around his complete body that was even whiter (like the representations of God by the Catholics), but I knew that he was a mature man, serene, peaceful, who was the spiritual master of the universe in which I dwelt. That he alone knew what was to be done, as he was the UNIVERSAL KNOWLEDGE that nobody considered to deny.

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Greatly important to me

What is your religion now? Buddhist toujours bouddhiste avec le grand bien etre que cela m'apporte et apporte aux personnes à mon contact

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience avant mon experience je n'avais pas de croyances par rapport à cela mais des informations que certaines personnes disaient avoir vécu.après l'avoir vécu je croyais avec certitude les gens

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I encountered men, women, children of all ages arriving, slightly set off to my left. They came towards me, smiled to me and peacefully continued on their way. Then, slightly set off to my right, I saw a movement in the light, and there appeared a being of light: tall, peaceful, comforting, powerful and gentle at the same time, who first watched me with kindness and then said to me, 'It's not yet your moment, you still have plenty of things to do on earth.' I know that it was a male voice, a very beautiful voice; one like I‘d never heard on earth.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain je ne suis pas catholique; et pourtant, depuis 13 ans que cette expérience m'est arrivée,je me dis que la religion catholique s'est emparée de cet etre de lumiere pour l'appeler dieu , car je voyais un être de lumière avec une aura encore plus blanche au

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? Unknown

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes un être de lumière avec une aura encore plus blanche que la lumière tout autour de lui,l'aura blanche plus importante autour de toute la tête, grand, un homme d'âge mûr, bienveillant, chaleureux, calme sûr de lui,très belle voix mais non terrestre,qui inspire une confiance totale, qui est le maitre de l'univers qui commande tout et que rien ni personne ne conteste car il possède la VERITE.Encore une fois je n'ai pas eu des informations, je l'ai vu donc je sais qu'il existe

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? Unknown

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Since my experience, I know that the real life on earth must be in kindness, compassion, being content with the minimum. Not doing any evil and that all those people running for glory, money, honors, and those killing will make a passage into the light: but will not stay there. They will be caught in the farthest beyond, so very dark, that I don't even have words to describe it.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? Unknown

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes quand j'étais dans la lumière en train d'attendre de voir passer les membres de ma famille décédés, je savais que tous les gens morts étaient là ou je me trouvais sauf les "gens morts"qui auraient été s'égarer dans l'au-delà encore plus haut et attrapés p

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I greatly feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I slightly fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes quand j'étais dans la lumière je me suis dit que la vie terrestre était faite de difficultés d'épreuves de maladies de bons et mauvais moments mais que tout cela n'était pas important car dès notre mort on serait là dans le bonheur total, la non- souffrance pour l'éternité et que la vie terrestre était tellement courte par rapport à l'éternité d'être dans la lumière qu'il fallait sur terre rester serein car on ne maitrisait rien et être toujours le maximum dans la bonté

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

Were you compassionate after your experience? Greatly compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life Moderate changes in my life. Before my experience, I had already decided about my attitude towards humanity during my life, and after the experience, I had the certainty that I had made the right choice. Now I feel very well in my being.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Yes I help sick people, and people with difficulties, even more. I believe that I bring a lot of well-being to the people surrounding me (they tell me that I'm calming them).

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes As existing words do not match with sensations, it's another dimension; you are moving with breathtaking speed, without moving air, our body has no weight, one is only feeling the wonderful, all is happiness; the bright light doesn't dazzle.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience mon expérience a eu lieu il y a 13 ans, je m'en souviens comme si cela s'était passé il y a quelques jours alors que les autres evenements de l'époque sont classés dans mon passé.Quand je parle de mon expérience, je suis toujours aussi émue, j'en ai parfois les larmes aux yeux et des frissons et j'aimerai pouvoir faire beneficier de cet instant "magique" aux gens que j'aime pour leur apporter le bonheur que j'ai eu dans ce moment là

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes Telepathy, flashes, certainty that certain events will happen, and they do happen; 'entities' coming to meet, feelings at certain places of past or coming violence or accidents; what will happen to people without knowing them.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? When I was in the light waiting to see my deceased family members, I knew that all the dead people were at the same place as I was. The ‘dead people’, who got lost in the far away beyond, were caught by ‘beings of indescribable cruelty and wickedness’. I didn't discover information, but I got undeniable certainties, that even today are still in my mind.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes The day I woke up at the hospital I told the nurse; he was not surprised as some patients had told him similar things. I spoke to friends, they listened, were not influenced.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Because of my medical studies, and my readings. I don't think having been influenced, as I was rather stunned having experienced this. I am quite frank and honest towards myself. I thought, at the time, that if I were influenced, with time I would forget things. There was no forgetting; 13 years after I still have everything in memory including the emotions felt.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real Simply the certainty and the sensations in my inner being; the emotions when I think about it.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Still the same, precision still as clear since 13 years, still the same emotions. I still fear death (fear to suffer and not wanting to leave loved ones); but since my experience, I know where I will be when I will die, and I know that I will find my family, my friends.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? This experience is very beautiful; it brought me an immeasurable happiness that I always keep inside me. When I have downs as everybody has, I think about it and find new energy. I live every day in the present, I'm simply profiting from earthly life, as I ‘came back, because I still have many things to do’, so I do them. A being of light had an even whiter aura than the light surrounding him. The white aura around the head was more important, he was tall, a mature man, kind, warm, calm, self-assured, very beautiful non-earthly voice, who inspired total trust, who is the master of the universe controlling everything; and who nothing nor anybody is disputing as he owns the TRUTH. Again, I didn't get information. I saw him, so I know that he exists. When I was in the light, I thought that earthly life was made up of difficulties, of trials, of diseases, of good and bad moments, and that not all this was important; because at our death we would be there in total happiness, not suffering for eternity. That terrestrial life was so very short in comparison to being in the light for eternity. On earth, we should remain serene, as we do not master anything and should always be in a maxim of kindness. Before my experience, I had no beliefs concerning this. But the information that certain people claimed to have experienced, and after my own experience, I, for sure, believed those people. My experience happened 13 years ago, I still remember it as if it happened only a few days ago, while other events at the time are now classified in my past. When I'm speaking of my experience, I'm still as moved as at the time. I sometimes have tears in my eyes and goose bumps and I would like to make people I love benefit from this 'magic' moment that I had.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? I find that far too many questions turn towards religion. I don't think that the name 'God' should be used, but the term a 'supreme being'.