Kim A NDE

Experience Description

While in the hospital for sepsis, I unknowingly began to experience fibrillation, a heart arrhythmia. I don't remember falling asleep, I only remember coming to, or waking up, and that I had 'been somewhere.' I told my nurse, 'Something just happened to me.'

What it felt like, was that I had been taken somewhere on the side of a cliff, overlooking a valley. Down below was what appeared to be the tops of trees. They were bathed in this golden-brown light. In front of me were several beings of light. One communicated with me, like thoughts flowing back and forth. I felt love, unconditional regard. The being, whom I'll call a spirit guide, although it could've been an angel, asked me a question. If this marked the end of my life, would I be satisfied with how it went? All I had said and done, and specifically how I responded to what was said and done to me?

Almost immediately, I was shown and taken into a large glowing orb, as big as the end of a room. On the outside it was alive with flashes, moving like hot lava. Inside, I was washed over with conversations and interactions from the past. I could see, hear and feel emotions, including those of others.

When I came out of the orb, I answered honestly, as I could sense that was what the being wanted to hear. An honest answer. It, and the others, seemed to know everything about me, but were nonjudgmental.

So I told it, or communicated with it, my thoughts flowing out from the center of my being to its center, that no, I would honestly have to say I would not be satisfied. Because what I felt most strongly inside the orb was that I had held back. Not said what I wanted to, not done the things I wanted, out of fear. Fear of being rejected, fear of something unknown. Fear of loss. Ordinarily, before this, I would say I was satisfied, and had many fulfilling experiences. So, I apparently had regrets of which I was unaware.

Once I communicated this, I was immediately transported back to my hospital bed. What I gained from osmosis, I guess, simply by being there, wherever it was, that the thing that matters most to them--to heaven? to God? is our relationships with each other. How we treat one another. Nothing else on earth really matters to them, there. Not politics, not making money, other than it's a helpful tool. Not the stock market. Just how we live with, and interact with, each other. That we do it well.

I also felt flooded with peace I'd never known. I realized that even as a child, I'd carried a certain weight on my shoulders. All of that was gone. It was absolutely wonderful!

Another gift I received by osmosis was the knowledge that life is a gift, a special gift we've each been given. It's up to us to choose how we will live it. We shouldn't rush through it, or waste it, or wish it away. We only get one, and that's it. Then we move forward.

Sometime after this happened, I looked out my hospital window and saw all these beautiful little lights, glowing. Hanging there, independently, without wires, just glowing. Either white or gold, like small Christmas lights. I'd never seen anything like them, or since, although I bought something similar, online, and it reminded me of this beautiful thing. I remember looking at them a long time, then my eyes getting tired, so I looked down the length of my hospital bed, then back again. They were there for several minutes, I'd say. Then, they were gone.

Whether they represented the angels or spirit beings (there were maybe a dozen or so), or if it was the portal I went through, I have no idea.

I also have no fear of death, as a result. It happened quickly, it seemed very far away but took no time to get there. It was as easy as falling off the back of a truck, and it was completely painless.

The spirit beings really did seem to have my best interests at heart. They cared about me deeply, even though I had no idea who they were.

At some point, after I initially shared with my nurse's aide that 'something had happened,' an RN came in, panicky, messing with my heart monitor leads, asking me 'did you feel that? are you feeling anything?' and I didn't. She called some department that does the actual monitoring, asking them to check what was showing up on their end. (This was a very large hospital.) Whatever happened, it alarmed her sufficiently that she told me she'd be right outside my door, and all I had to do was push the button, and she'd come.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 6/12/2017

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Life threatening event, but not clinical death. I was in the hospital for sepsis, and was in danger of losing a kidney. I began to experience afib.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Neither pleasant NOR distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Just that everything seemed more real than here on earth, especially when entering the orb.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? All throughout, but most vivid was seeing and being inside the giant glowing orb.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses More vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Just that I was seeing things there, that I've never seen, here. Also, the beautiful lights I saw in the window, a day or two later.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't recall hearing anything, except the conversations from the past, in the orb.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain Don't recall.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes The beings or spirit guides had light emanating from their torsos or bodies. The golden brown light in the valley below. The lights in the window, later.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm The ledge or cliff I was standing on, overlooking this golden valley. I still remember the color of the light down below, looking like treetops.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Of being accepted, and loved. Immense peace like I've never felt before. Alertness, receptivity to what I was being told or asked.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others Just how important our relationships with each other, are. That that's all that matters, to heaven/God. And how precious life is, truly a gift we should not waste or rush through.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control When I entered this glowing orb, I could hear and feel events, conversations, from the past. And I think I could see people, too. I could feel others' emotions.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will Once I answered the question, of whether I honestly felt I'd lived my life to my satisfaction, and answered no, I immediately was sent back. Only after sharing this story with others did someone mention that probably determined my fate, whether I stayed there, or came back. I didn't see it that way, at the time.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Protestant

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I do believe some of us are given a glimpse of heaven before we die. I think it's what the Apostle Paul was talking about when he wrote about a man who was taken up to the third heaven. It helps me understand heaven more. It helps me proclaim scripture at the grave much more confidently.

What is your religion now? Christian- Protestant

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I didn't see Jesus. I didn't see God. I have had visions of Jesus while in prayer at my church, probably 14 years ago. With it came an interior knowing of who the face was, kind of like the knowledge I received or communication that came, during my experience--by osmosis of being there, or receiving through some kind of absorption.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes How important our relationships are. I knew this before, but it became clearer.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin One standing in front of me, which communicated by thoughts that seemed to flow out of them, and into me. Others in back of, and beside them. Maybe one row behind, and a line of four or five to the side, for a total of 8-10. Light emanated from them, like clothing.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes Although only one of the spirit beings spoke, it was clear they were all of one accord, in agreement.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes Someone or ones know all about me, love and care about me, want the best for me, and have some power over my life. They want honesty. They are immensely concerned with how we treat each other, here.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Only what I've reported earlier. I honestly believe I never would've been able to see or understand what I received there, unless I'd gone there. I'd never been able to feel what other people feel, or to answer the question honestly, whether I was satisfied with my life to that point, because I didn't have access to the info, otherwise.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes That all that matters is our relationships with each other, and that we care for one another. That life is a gift. (I had struggled with depression years earlier, for a long time, and over that period of time, felt dead inside.) I also believe I was given this experience because it was uniquely tailored to me. Someone else would receive something else.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists Yes This was clearly a place where things were sorted out, and where I would come back to.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I would describe it as unconditional positive regard, what I felt while there. I never felt like I was going to get thumped in the head for doing something, or not doing something I should've.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life I did the things I wanted to do but had put off, like moving my piano to my current home, buying an antique sheet music cabinet. I made sure to have lunch with an old classmate. I lived without fear for a long time, until the world slowly crept back in.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes Just that I value people more.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes At first I struggled to recall what had happened, to put it into some order. As I reassembled the experience, I started to lose bits and pieces of what I'd seen. I kept the larger parts, to be able to tell the story.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience.e experience Because of the content and the fact that what I saw always seemed more real to me, than this world, it's made a definite impression on my mind and life. I can remember snippets of what happened in the hospital, although I was very sick, but I don't think this experience will ever leave me.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Almost as soon as it happened. I emailed my nurse practitioner. I didn't even know how to explain it. I thought it was something that was uniquely for me, that it hadn't happened to other people before. We never discussed NDE's in seminary. I didn't even know to categorize it as an NDE until she mentioned something similar happening to her grandma, during childbirth. I've shared it with people I'm ministering to, when it's appropriate. It gives them hope, I think. My first memorial service was for a man around 60. His widow's friend who came with her to plan the service said her husband had shared something similar about three times when he was in ICU, shortly before his death. Mostly, people have received it well. As a pastor, I take a risk in sharing, especially with colleagues. So I mostly share it one on one.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain Not really. I'd read the book Heaven is for Real but didn't know what to think of it. After my experience, I began reading everything I could about NDE's, especially from a Christian perspective.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It was much more vivid than a dream. It contained info I couldn't have received, otherwise. Receiving my NP's email certainly helped me process it. I also was listening to a song, once at home, that said Billy Graham had an NDE. The fact I'd never heard that, really spoke to me!

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes I guess the lights in the window were like small reminders of the glowing orb I entered into, which I saw a day or two later.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It's been a tremendous blessing, which I'm grateful for. I'm not afraid to share it with others.