Lisette SL Probable NDE

Experience Description

Following a difficult pregnancy during which I suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum, was admitted to the hospital 3 times before I was 10 weeks pregnant. I became pre-eclamptic at full-term. I had planned a natural childbirth with labor in a birth tub, but due to circumstances was not allowed to do this. I was induced at 7:30am the day after being admitted to hospital. Uncontrolled contractions swiftly began in close succession.

By 3 pm, I was dilated 4 cm, was fatigued and requested an epidural. Contractions continued throughout the day and by 8pm, I was still not progressing despite continuous contractions and was given a second epidural. Doctor broke my amniotic sac to help labor progress but by 10:30pm I had still not dilated beyond 6cm and fetal monitor showed baby in distress. I was prepped for C-section and taken to operating room

The Anesthesiologist to my right put a mask over my nose and mouth and instructed me to inhale. I remember my (then) husband, standing to my left and imploring the anesthesiologist to remove the mask because he saw me beginning to wretch. I remember the mask being switched out for an emesis basin and wretched into it. I think I then lost consciousness and the next thing I remember is a whooshing sound and feeling of vertigo then an awareness that I was no longer in my body but about 4 feet behind and above myself, then I was gone somewhere else outside of time, in complete darkness. Rather than fear, I felt utterly at peace. I felt indescribably comfortable and loved.

I was aware of an omnipotent and omniscient Presence who communicated without words. I remember 2 other presences/energies also- I believe they were the souls of two children I had previously been unable to bring to term due to my inability to get sufficient or effective treatment for hyperemesis. I felt only Love and joy and wanted to stay there. I felt entirely peaceful where I was in whatever state of consciousness that was outside of space and outside of time. I had the ability to know the future, then was offered a choice by the Presence (God?) to return to this state of consciousness in which we live on Earth. I remember not wanting to come back but knowing that I needed to in order to raise the child I had been giving birth to when I left my body. I was reluctant and felt apprehensive. I heard the whooshing sound and felt suction and then remember being back in my body and hearing my husband's voice repeatedly telling me to 'Wake up! Wake up, Lise and open your eyes! Open your eyes and look at your daughter!'

I remember feeling disappointment and tremendous guilt because I felt disappointed being back. I feel tremendously guilty at not wanting to return to raise my daughter despite loving her more than anything. Since this experience, I have had an inability to tolerate people's unwillingness to love without reservation and an urgency to feel completely connected to the people I love in a way that they don't seem to be able to manage or tolerate or understand the importance of. I no longer fear death and have at times wished that I could have stayed wherever I was during my NDE/STE. I often feel isolated and alone even in the presence of people I love (sometimes, especially so) and long to feel the complete sense of love and peace that I felt during my experience again.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 10/10/2001

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Childbirth Life threatening event, but not clinical death Maternal pre-eclampsia and fetal distress necessitated C-section.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? Uncertain I don't remember being aware of any earthly events other than when I was given the choice to return, so I know I was aware that I was outside of earthly reality. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I had a complete knowingness of everything that is indescribable during my experience.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I felt most conscious and alert and myself when I was outside my body. Before I left it and after I came back into it, I felt nauseous and groggy and drugged (I was!).

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning There was no time. Time was irrelevant there.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I wouldn't describe my experience as vision because it did not need eyes. It was knowing, not seeing. Before the experience, I was feeling sick and drugged and groggy. During the experience, I had none of those sensations and knew only peace and love.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My hearing immediately prior faded out as I was being drugged. I heard an incredibly loud whooshing as I left and re-entered my body.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? Yes, but the facts have not been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain The whooshing sound and darkness could be described as a tunnel-like experience but I really felt outside of space. A tunnel is an enclosed space, so I'm not sure I could accurately describe what I experienced as a tunnel.

Did you see any beings in your experience? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I believe two of the presences were children of mine who were never born.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I was outside of time and space as we understand them. There was only peaceful infinite eternity. The past, present and future were all one.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Boundless, eternal peace and love, and joy in the presence of the energies/souls I encountered. Wistfulness at knowing I needed to return here.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe I seemed to know and understand everything while I was there.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No I don't remember-

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from my personal future I wouldn't use the word scenes because it wasn't visual, it was knowing. I knew my child would experience pain that I could prevent if I came back.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life I left my body while giving birth and returned because I knew my child needed me.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I pray and talk to Spirit/God. I am wonderous at the beauty and fragility of life. I am incredibly grateful for the gift of life (even though I have difficulty with feelings of isolation at not being able to feel as connected as I know is possible).

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths Attended Quaker Meeting as infant and was raised Unitarian. My preferred spiritual practice is Quaker Meeting, if any.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I had no particular religious beliefs nor expectations one way or the other about extra-physical existence before my experience.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I now know for certain that everything matters.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin I was aware of an immense, enveloping, omniscient and (loving!) omnipotent presence/energy/frequency.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I sensed their presence

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Uncertain I was aware that I was outside of time, therefore I exist before and after this life. I do not know (or at least recall) that I have had other physical incarnations.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I was aware that the child I was giving birth to when I left my body needed to connect to me physically to live.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes The main Presence I encountered might be described as what many people might call God.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Again, I feel an urgency to love that I cannot explain.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I knew/know that we are here to experience and create love in all the ways that our physical form allows.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists Yes During my experience, I was outside of my body, outside of time and space; so obviously there is extra-earthly continued existence outside of (before and after) life.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Yes I feel an intense urgency to love. I'm not sure why the urgency is relevant but I feel that it is-

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes I was aware that my child would experience difficulties/hardship that would necessitate my presence to either prevent or to survive.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes Love is the whole purpose of life.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Unknown Everything has changed in ways that are indescribable.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I feel frustrated, isolated and saddened by my inability to connect to others as completely as I know is possible.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The whole experience was unlike any reality that is possible so there are no words to adequately describe it; though it was more real than anything I have ever experienced in this human existence.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. My experience is as vivid as though it happened yesterday but it happened 20 years ago-

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I seem to be more empathic and intuitive and I pay more attention to coincidences and signs.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The feeling of urgency to live my purpose (love) to the fullest extent possible to leave the most positive impact I can where love is needed most is what motivates me.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes soon afterward. Some believed and seemed comforted, others attempted to rationalize my experience as a dream or fantasy or side effect of anesthesia. I don't know for certain how they were influenced.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably real I knew what I had experienced felt entirely real but my training in science (I majored in biological sciences in college) still caused me to attempt to question whether my experience could be discounted as the result of anesthesia at first.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real The effects of anesthesia cannot account for what I experienced. The reality of my experience is only strengthened by the hallmark similarities to thousands of other peoples' NDEs/STEs.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Thank you for allowing me the privilege of sharing my experience.