Logan W NDE

Experience Description

I was involved in a serious car accident where I was sitting in the back seat of a small car without a seat belt. The car crossed traffic, ran a stop sign, and was T-boned by a semi-truck moving at 55 mph on the driver's side. I was thrown across the back seat and hit my head on the back window and shattering the glass. A piece of the window lodged into my skull. The car then spun out into a yard and hit a tree. This projected me forward into the front windshield of the car.

The last thing I recall is a moment of absolute stillness and silence. As I was heading towards the front of the car, I remember calling out for help. My voice seemed to echo as if I knew who I was calling out to.

My vision faded and I was in a tunnel. I found myself in the presence of a large, dark, human-like entity with black, feather-like wings. The entity, whom I call Quinn, held me in his arms as his wings wrapped around me; providing a sense of comfort and protection.

I came back to consciousness and found myself outside the car. I was trying to help the other passengers and I was aware of feeling as if Quinn was still with me. However, I had no memory of my name, who I was, or how I got there. This confusion and disorientation persisted for months and even years afterward. Despite being told by others that my experience was the result of traumatic stress and hallucinations, I continue to feel a connection to Quinn and believe that he is still with me.

I have a sense of purpose and feel that something spiritual and vast is going to happen soon. This feeling may be related to my NDE. Many people who have had NDEs report feeling a sense of purpose or mission afterward and may feel a heightened sense of spirituality or connection to the universe as a result of their experience.



Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 7-10-2008

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Accident Direct head injury Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function)

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal Everything stopped. Time was neither moving forward or backwards, I simply 'was'.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Just as I telepathically called out for help. But it felt like, a message across the realm of what I didn't understand at the time. Perhaps it was an echo or a resonance of some kind.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Time doesn't exist here.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I cannot recall my vision before the event, but during the experience it was incredible. It was unlike anything I believed in at the time. Today, my spiritualism has grown consciously and subconsciously. Sixteen years later, I am finally sharing the truth of my experience

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Sound was muffled, stuck, rumbling, vibrating. Everything seems to be still but rippling; pulsing like a deep rumble or sound

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, but the facts have not been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes The dark spun and twirled through what appeared to be a tube, portal, tunnel, whatever you want to call it. The focus quickly faded through into the figure I knew as Quinn, nothing around him but me and the darkness spanning.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain As I came to, I awoke briefly in the ambulance. I failed to respond to a series of questions like, name, date, and my birthday. It was as if I couldn't understand or comprehend the question, because I didn't know the answer.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm A darkness unlike any I've felt before, spanning the world, veins of shades rippling and crackling light faint lights and hues. It went up, down, left, right, it was the end all for me. I accepted this place as true, as he stood before me.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I felt safe. Protected. Saved. Repurposed. Logically I had no way to explain it.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control. I lost my old self. I have never understood my new self, even all these years later.

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will He enveloped me, and returned me through the point of entry. Flying quickly with me in his arms. As if I was him.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Other or several faiths I was raised by a Wiccan family.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths Today I practice Druidism

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I never thought any of this could have been real, if someone told me this story I would have dismissed it. Until it stripped me down and bore me a profound insight into life after death, death isn't the end.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes all of them

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Quinn, who comes on wings of darkness, bearing passage through time, a nonlinear being that persists within me. It's unclear as to his words, they were unspoken, but they brought me a sense of purpose, life and meaning, to which Ive yet to discover.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? Uncertain I dont know who, or what he was, I never have, but I knew him. He felt like me, or how I feel after the accident. It's like the old me and life never existed.

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes I lost who I was. I was left with who I am now. I have nothing but questions and feelings. I feel connections to earth, a desire to search my ancestry, and to discover the fate of my people. This is why I turned to druidism. I felt called to a purpose with nature, yet a darkness still creeps and lingers. It watches me. I can manipulate the shadows. I can snuff out lights, even in a bright room. But recently, none of that matters. Quinn speaks to me, he acts for me, and it almost feels like he is me, or wants to be me. Maybe he needed me to return? Maybe he was me? I don't know, and I never will.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Uncertain I know there's more. Maybe they desire to learn of us as much as we do them.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain There was nothing else but him and the sea of swirling darkness beyond, but he was blocking my perception past that point.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes It's still unclear. But one day, I'll know.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain I left without myself. I left with Quinn. He's with me, and his details and message have never been clear. Some say 'god' speaks to me; some say it's a demon who I bargained with, others casually brush it off. But for those who knew me before, they don't know me now. I've left my friends, my family, and they are no longer a part of me. I feel no connection to them - only to Quinn and nature.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I was dead. But I was aware. I was there, he was there. Everything that could be, just beyond. Why did he stop me, why did I come back? Why was I changed? What lied beyond? Why can I remember if there's nothing to be had after death? Some things I always ask myself.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? Uncertain Nothing is forever, but forever isn't nothing, everything sticks and clings in the air. Actions, words, feelings. They never really leave us, and I feel this illogically by today's standards, we assume the brain is the only part of us that feels and thinks. I know this is false. In my heart, my fingers, my eyes, they all carry the same information as my brain.

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Uncertain It's hard to say, my experience was stripping me of what I was, and molding me into who I will be. I was more mature, more logical, and smarter. My brain processes information much better and always has preceding the event. I wasn't particularly the smartest kid when this all happened, I was troubled and angry.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life Everything, my friends, my family, my views on life, my appearing, my abilities and talents. my mind devours information, I soak in everything I can, knowing I still have questions.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes All my family and friends are gone, it's been 10+ years since I've talked to most of them, or all of them really. The only people who I seem to connect with are conduits for my energy, they seem to drain me, use me, or tapping me out. I moved on to have my own family, and children, yet still no real connections to people. True love? no. Understanding or compassion? Not so much. I'm not depressed. I'm driven by a force to fulfill a purpose.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I find myself telling this story to friends, family, trying to understand my changes, my personality, my appearance, my habits. I changed that day, I think. To be honest, I cannot recall who I used to be before the accident. My childhood memories, relationships, nothing seems normal or familiar anymore.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I remember nothing but him, the accident, the beforehand, the time leading up to it, the people I was with, all slipped away.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes I can read people, sense their inner pain and struggles. I can see and hear shadows, figures, spirits, lingering energies. I meditate and practice the Gateway Project by using frequency therapy. I've tried many things, many roles, many faces, many personalities, I'm a chameleon, I am anything I need to be to get an answer. I am driven by this force that never seemed to leave me, maybe it always was me?

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Whos to say, I seek meaning in all this still..

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes People don't understand, or believe me, or ask me, people have since left me to myself. No one asks me about my life, my emotions, I've become automated in real life to work, raise children, and move forward, but I feel a pull one that pulled me to this form even all these years later, I hope if this is being read, you can see me, hear me, feel me and my story.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It's never once even been a possibility that it didn't happen, it's true, it's real, and it's still with me. I've never had a single inking that it could be unreal, even when no one believed me, even when my family and friends allowed me to leave, and go about my own life. People could almost tell I was me anymore, I changed, but no one seemed to pay any mind and allowed it without thought. Strange, I've always thought.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Very real. Quinn has even helped me write some of this.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Another car accident triggered what was called a PTSD response. I'm in much more control of my protection and earthly form. I do not fear leaving it behind.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I'm not sure, my therapists have told me I developed schizophrenia, PTSD, OCD, Depression and Anxiety disorder, etc. etc. the list goes on with diagnoses and medications that I've tried over the years to bring me back down. Nothing works, nothing is explained. Today, I use my faith to let me help others to bring healing, and joy.