Lorraine J NDE

Experience Description

I was five years old. It began like a normal illness, with stomach pains and flu symptoms. But then, my fever spiked. My mother called an ambulance. When they put me in, I was really scared. Several months prior, my great-grandmother had died and I associated ambulances with death. They had to calm me down because I was practically hysterical. My mother decided to ride with me in the ambulance so that I would calm down. I was very weak. Then it happened, halfway to the hospital. I left my body and the ambulance behind. I thought I would fall and hurt myself so I put my arm out to shield my body from the fall. But, I remained standing in the air. I turned around and saw the ambulance going off without me. I asked myself what was happening. How could I get out of here?

I came to an intersection and saw my father still behind the wheel of his car. He was headed towards the hospital. I tried to make him notice me but he didn't and just kept driving. Why didn't he see me? He wouldn't leave me here alone. So now, I was really all alone in some kind of place that I didn't really recognize. I wanted to go home. Grandmother was at home. So I decided to head over that way. I got there really fast. But I made a mistake and landed in a grocery store. Inside was my uncle. I went over to him but he didn't see me. Why not? I was at a loss. I followed him outside. To my surprise, I went through the glass door without opening it. I didn't understand that either. I was so confused. My aunt was waiting for my uncle in the car. They talked a little bit but neither one of them noticed me. I sat in the car so that I could ride with them since they lived right next door to me. Once home, I saw that my grandmother did not notice me. Slowly I began to understand. I stood by the front door and it became clear that I had died.

It was an unusual feeling. I tried to fly and I could! I flew over the neighborhood houses and felt light and full of joy that I could do so. I could still feel. I thought about my mother and father and felt sadness. They were both very sad. I landed in a schoolyard. I wanted to find out what kind of world I was in since I couldn't leave it. I went into a small gym. Inside were students and a teacher. They were playing some kind of sport. Maybe soccer or hockey, I don't know which exactly. I realized suddenly that I was rising. I thought I would reach heaven so I looked down to say goodbye to the students - they had their whole lives ahead of them to live and they didn't even know that I could see them.

Above me was a small black opening. It swallowed me up. I was flying through a tunnel very fast but it felt weird. I heard a noise, like a wind sound. It was all so crazy! The tunnel was black, pitch-black. Then it got light again. At the end of the tunnel was a light. The walls of the tunnel kept moving away from one another. It felt like I was in a cave with smooth walls. It seemed very big and damp. I didn't know what I was doing here and it seemed as though a long time had passed. This place seemed familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it. I waited in the middle of the tunnel or cave. The light emanated warmth, love and happiness. It was a living light. I heard beautiful music. I went directly into the light. Once inside it felt as though I was home again. Everything was white and full of love. I was secure here.

Shortly thereafter, I landed in a large world with many beings and brilliant blue sky. In the middle was a road. I was really wowed! It was beautiful, so lush. Along the road were stones that had colors I had never seen before. And suddenly, my great-grandmother was before me. She told me it was my decision to stay or to return to earth. She said it would be better if I returned. Great-grandmother seemed much wiser here than when she was alive on earth. She also emanated a lot of warmth. I told her I wanted to see just a little more here. I was curious. I went walking. Then I thought about my mother and father. No, I didn't want to stay any longer. I decided that next time I would see this world because I knew that one day I would be returning.

I went back, back into the light, which now spoke to me. It was a telepathic communication. The light showed me pictures of the future. Nice things, like one day I would get married. It showed me my future husband. I didn't know him at that moment. He was going to be very sick but would make it. I heard that it was a mycotic infection in the lungs. I didn't understand those words. I thought he would die and started to feel very unhappy. The light kept telling me that he would live through his illness. I saw doctors, nuns and nurses - whom I would meet years later. In addition, I was going to forget all the details of this NDE. I would only remember much later. I heard the light say everything would be all right. I said goodbye to the light and went back to the darkness. It took a while for me to return to the ambulance. I saw my body lying on the stretcher and went back into it. When I woke up I vaguely remembered a light and darkness. At the hospital, they examined me and a nun asked me where I had been, because of the light and the darkness. She thought I had dreamt it. But that didn't convince me. I didn't speak any more about the experience and forgot about it for a few years. Then I remembered it all years later.

Everything happened the way the light had shown me it would. And it really was really alright.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: Mai 1990

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Illness Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function) Cardiac arrest.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Mixed

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal The whole time.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? The whole time.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning There time seems to go by slowly while here it's only a couple of minutes. It felt like I was gone a long time, or else that time didn't even exist.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I can't really describe it. Everything was so intense.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was as if I could hear better than on earth.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes See description above.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes I met my great-grandmother. See description above.

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes See description above.

The experience included: A landscape or city

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm siehe Bericht

The experience included: Strong emotional tone

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Confused, afraid but also relieved and happy. The feelings changed with each situation.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe

Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control

The experience included: Vision of the future

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future See description above.

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Moderate

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I knew that we all come from that other world and will return to it.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes To write how I felt.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I can sense other people's moods very clearly. I know immediately what kind of character they have. I can also sense people's feelings of sympathy or hostility towards me.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, the light and my husband. When he was so sick, I had this constant feeling of having lived this already. I couldn't figure it out. I knew it would all turn out well but still felt very afraid. It's good that the light showed me this event otherwise I would have felt even more fear and anxiety.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Twenty years later. The reactions were positive.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It was very real. It really happened.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was real. A dream doesn't feel the same.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? Yes, there is life after death.