Manuel M NDE

Experience Description

I was attending a meeting of volunteers in the diocesan building with about 20 people. Shortly before the meeting, I had stopped at McDonald's for a medium-size cup of decaffeinated coffee. As it had happened in two previous occasions, the young employee who poured the coffee seems to have given me regular coffee. I cannot drink regular coffee due to its effects on my cardio-vascular system because it produces cardiac arrythmia and high blood pressure.

In the previous occasions, the arrythmia and the increase in blood pressure were moderate, although clearly detectable. This time, as soon as I felt the irregular heart beat, I lost contact with my surroundings and immediately transitioned to another reality. I found myself in an illuminated space, whose boundaries I could not detect. I could see in front and above me was a structure that I can't describe, but it did not intrigue me at all. I think that I knew what it was. I remember this structure as a fuzzy cloud that makes me think of an entrance point into something. I did not see anything else in this space; neither objects nor people.

I felt that everything was in perfect order and I was free of any concern, pain, struggle or anxiety. I was totally aware of myself and of my identity. I was totally lucid and comfortable. I did not have any memory of my life. I didn't remember anything or anyone. I knew that I was dying, but it was my choice to die or not to die. I also knew that either choice was perfectly o.k. I felt ready to die, but, suddenly, the image of my 1 1/2 year old granddaughter was appeared in front of me. I decided that I still had to be with her. As soon as I made this decision, I returned to the conference room and I could hear and see all the other people.

I asked the person sitting in front of me to call the ambulance, which he did. By the time the paramedics arrived, I was already feeling near normal. They confirmed that my blood pressure was elevated (Systolic at 170, while in my case it normally is at around 130) and my pulse was over 100 (my normal pulse is around 70). I was not taken to the hospital. I waited for a while and then I returned home on my own.

A few remarks seem appropriate:

1. I could not see my body while in that other reality. I was just a point of consciousness.

2. Everything that I describe above happened at once, except the appearance of my granddaughter's image that terminated the experience. The whole event could have been seconds or hours in ordinary time.

3. I returned with the awareness that I have a job to do for or with my granddaughter, with whom I have a very loving and joyful relationship.

4. I decided to share this experience at this time because I recently had another episode of arrythmia due to a medication, although this time I did not have any special occurrence. After suspending the medication, I returned to normal.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: Summer 2016

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Cardiac Arrythmia produced by Caffeine. Other: Not sure, but I think my heart stopped briefly. I was accidentally given a regular (with caffeine) cup of coffee, which triggered a strong arrythmia and lost contact with this world.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Neither pleasant NOR distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. In spite of the uniqueness of the situation, there were no doubts or uncertainties. Everything was perfectly clear and unequivocal.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Throughout

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Everything I experienced happened at once, although I had to describe it sequentially. The only exception to this perception is the appearance of my granddaughter's image, which happened at the conclusion of the event.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I couldn't see this reality. I was witnessing another reality, without shadows or doubts.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I did not perceive any sound.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere, as if by ESP? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Uncertain I was not aware of any deceased beings, but I saw the image of my living granddaughter at the conclusion of the event.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain The space where I found myself was all lighted but I couldn't see the source of that light.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I don't think that I could call 'mystical' the illuminated space I encountered but it was certainly not of this world (unearthly).

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Freedom, security, calm, clarity.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Relief or calmness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about myself or others I was totally aware of myself, but I did not have any memories. I must conclude that my 'self' is independent from my earthly memories.

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life I had the choice to die or not to die. I decided not to die when I saw my granddaughter's image. I felt that either decision was perfectly ok.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Christian- Catholic I have been a Catholic all my life. The event happened during a meeting of volunteers in the diocesan building.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I live with a heightened awareness of the immediacy of eternity and of God's project.

What is your religion now? Christian- Catholic. Being widowed and retired allows me to dedicate time and resources to service in my parish and evangelization of adults in my parish and in the diocesan adult formation program.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience I believe that we have another, fuller, existence after this one. During the event, my perception and feelings were of order, calm and security. The whole experience, while underway, seemed to me completely natural, obvious, easy, but when I returned I found it extraordinary that dying can be so easy.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes More than ever, I want to focus on what matters the most, which is God's project and my mission within it. I feel that God granted me an extension because he wants me to work better with him even if I often don't understand what he wants. I am sure that somehow I will figure it out. If he can bring me back and forth between this life and the other as easily as he did, he can guide me in my remaining years.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Uncertain The 'purpose' was somehow suggested or maybe discerned from the experience and it was embraced by me, freely. I decided to live for my baby granddaughter.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Uncertain The primary meaning, or mission, for the rest of my life (I was 70 years old already) was to do something for or with my granddaughter.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? An afterlife definitely exists Yes I knew that I was dying and the reality I was witnessing was related to my death. I also felt that everything was in perfect order, everything.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Uncertain I decided to return out of love for my granddaughter, otherwise, I would have died.

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life More than ever, I want to focus on what matters the most, which is God's project and my mission within it. I feel that God granted me an extension because he wants me to work better with him even if I often don't understand what he wants. I am sure that somehow I will figure it out. If he can bring me back and forth between this life and the other as easily as he did, he can guide me in my remaining years.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I am more respectful and compassionate with everyone I meet. I know that they will be my companions for ever an even fuller life.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain I really can't describe my surroundings and the degree of alertness and clarity is far beyond what I experience in my normal condition.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. Everything I experienced during the event is completely clear in my memory to this day, while I don't even remember what the meeting in the diocese was about that day. When I wrote it down I realize that I remember it completely, or so it seems to me.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain I don't know how to say this, but people look at me and greet me on the street, as though they knew me. Very small children stare at me in public places and smile. This did not happen before.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I have a heightened sense of mission for the remaining years of my life. This actually goes beyond my relationship with my granddaughter. She was like the 'bait' that God chose to re-purpose my life.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I told my son the next time I was with him. We see each other almost daily. He did not seem surprise. I have told a few friends who didn't seem surprise either.

Did you have any knowledge of near-death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes In 1976, I had a client who told me about her NDE after her second suicide attempt. In the late 90s, my sister told me about hers in 1995 during a cardiac arrest. Both narratives involved out of the body experiences, a tunnel and a bright light at the end of the tunnel. Mine was different.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. I never doubted of the reality of my experience.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real. I think that I understand better how it fits in my life.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? No

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? It seems too long. I don't know if you get many people who complete the questionnaire in its entirety. Editing specific pages is difficult.