Melinda B NDE

Experience Description

I did not know who I was. I did not know my name, although I knew that I was an adult female. I didn't know that I was married or if I had kids. I was in spirit form. I visually looked like myself, but was translucent and could go through objects. I was outside of the planet earth in space and outside of time. An instant was forever and forever was an instant. I had no physical sensations. I had no physical pain. I was intensely aware that I HAD to get back into time. I had a need was overpowering, desperate, and distressing. Nothing existed except this need. I had no other thoughts, experiences, or needs. I had to get back into time, which also meant back to planet Earth and back into my body. Otherwise, I would be like this forever and that was very bad. I willed my body to float/fly from space back into Earth. I saw myself getting closer to earth. I had not yet reached Earth and then the experience stopped. I no longer had awareness. I had been put on heavy sedation for the intubation. I woke later and remembered the near death experience but I have no memory for 9 hours prior to the near death experience and 10 hours afterwards.

The setting of the experience was that earlier that day when I had surgery in my foot. At 3 pm, I was aware enough to understand my surgeon telling me the surgery went well and the local pain pump would be used to help control my pain. I have no memory of anything else other than the near death experience, until 10 am the next day. Around 12 pm, I had a medically unexplained reaction to the general anesthetic in the local pain pump. It appears to have gone throughout my body. I had a grand mal seizure, went into respiratory and cardiac arrest. The defibrillator was used and I was intubated. Medication was administered to stop the reaction. That worked. I was in intensive care unit with intubation until about 7 am. This changed my life in that I had frequent thoughts of suicide prior to this experience and have had no thoughts of suicide since. I no longer wish for death to end my chronic physical pain issues. Death will come soon enough and I will wait.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 09/06/2021

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Surgery-related Drug or medication overdose. While under general anesthesia. CPR given. Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function) I was having a medically unexplained reaction to general anesthesia that had been placed into a local pain pump. I had a grand mal seizure, respiratory and cardiac failure. A defibrillator was used to regain stable heart rate and I was intubated.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness. It was not different.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Time did not exist. The experience seemed very uniform. I was at the same awareness for the entire thing.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. There was no time. I was outside of time. An instant was forever and forever was an instant. I had no way of telling how long I was there or how long I would be there.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Seemed the same.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I don't remember hearing anything at all. There was nothing to hear. No one was talking. I was by myself.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? Uncertain I saw darkness of space and I saw earth. The lighting seemed like what I've seen in documentaries about space.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? I was desperate and upset.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? No

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Other or several faiths I believe there are spirits but we are not able to understand them. I believe our souls are imortal but we are unable to understand what comes before or after this life.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths I believe there are spirits but we are not able to understand them. I believe our souls are immortal but we are unable to understand what comes before or after this life.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. Prior to this, I believed I would go on to the next life regardless of circumstances of my life and death.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I used to believe we go onto our next life no matter what. Now, I think we may need to complete the reason we are here or we might get stuck in a bad state.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes Just that I needed to complete why I am alive before I can move on to my next life.

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes I understood that if I died before I was meant to, I would be stuck in this type of state. I believed this meant that in order to move forward in the intended afterlife. I have to complete the life I was supposed to complete.

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I was aware that if I died, I would remain in this unpleasant state forever. This would be my afterlife. I had no information about any other people's afterlife or what my afterlife would be under a different situation.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Slight changes in my life Prior to this experience I often fantasized about dying as a way to put an end to my chronic physical pain. I have not since. Now, I'd rather wait to die until I am meant to. Now I think I might get stuck in a bad state if I don't complete my intended life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I do not know how my remembrance of the experience compares to my remembrance of other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. There is no way to measure the accuracy of this. I have no memory of what was actually happening. I could not hear or see what was going on around me.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Being stuck in a timeless state was very unpleasant. It's important to me that does not become my afterlife.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I told others right away. I don't know if they were influenced. They found it fascinating and bizarre.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I knew that they are fairly common and most people have pleasant experiences involving light and choice of whether to live.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was probably not real The experience is probably from unusual and misunderstood brain activity.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was probably not real The experience was probably from unusual brain activity caused from lack of oxygen

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? No

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? None come to mind