Dr. Phil P FDE and NDE

Experience Description

I am driving home from work on a snow-covered highway. I can barely see anything through the driving snow, but I have already passed four accident scenes.

I look into the distance. A concrete barrier at the entrance to a curve is part of a construction site with a closed part of the road. Therefore, I change lanes. The driver behind suddenly loses control while changing lanes, his car skids and touches my rear bumper. Out of the reaction of being startled, I want to make way for him, but this causes my car to lose traction completely. My car shoots forward like an arrow. The wheels grip nothing and inevitably hurtle head-on toward the concrete barrier in the curve. All over!

I scream out, and my eyes go black. Then I feel myself rising quickly from the car, and I see the memories of my life falling to earth in flashing golden images.

I look back on my life, my eyes fall on Heinz, who smiles at me, and all at once, I remember: "We are constructivists! We can determine how we see our lives!" So I decided to examine the falling memories and see if they gave me a clue as to how I might survive my impact on the concrete barrier.

At the moment of my decision, the experiences - in the form of golden images associated with flashing threads falling out of my body - begin to rise and spin around my spirit body. From this, it is drawn into length, expanding more and more, until it touches one of the memories and is immediately absorbed by it:

It is night. I sit next to my friend Florian and experience how the car slides back and forth on the icy road from the passenger seat. Whenever the car's tires regain grip, he steps on the gas to navigate us past the power lines and out of the local area. The power line's wooden poles are as massive as trees and at least as dangerous in a collision as if we were driving into a house made of concrete.

In this way, we drift from one side of the road to the other and make it out of the village area with our last ounce of strength. In the process, we have gained some speed, which will be an incredible stroke of luck for our survival because we will need the speed to escape from our accident situation.

Finally, our car loses all grip and slithers across both lanes inexorably toward the ditch. I see the wide-open eyes of both of our fear-distorted faces. Then I experience the moment of the accident, again from the passenger's perspective. I scream as the car finally leaves the road and glides eerily silent across the ditch, looking up at the night sky.

Then my spirit body leaves the car again. I just see our car jump over the ditch to hit the snow of the icy field with all four wheels simultaneously. Miraculously, the axles hold, and I can just see the car speeding away through the field at car speed as my spirit body goes skyward, my memory dissolving into black nothingness.

Again the golden images of my life memories flow through me. Then the flow comes to an abrupt halt, and I lose consciousness.

When I regain consciousness, I see myself sitting in the dense fog of the steam sauna next to my friend Wolfgang. He tells me about his accident and how he was rammed sideways in his car.

He is happy about how lucky he was that this happened to him in the city and not on the highway, and he thinks that if he had been driving over fifty kilometers per hour, he would have died immediately. So the accident only broke his hip. I oversee us and learn.

In this second memory, I am less taken in by the emotionality of the memory. So I have more control than in the first one. Therefore, I see the whole situation simultaneously - without switching internal and external perspectives in the observation. I can even enjoy this memory's peace and the feeling of shared security.

Wolfgang is a good friend. Overall, I have probably learned more about science through his work on my texts than from the professors in my studies. I don't know anyone else who works so meticulously in every subject area as he does.

We spent over an hour in the steam sauna that day, and he explained to me every detail of the accident - as well as what would have been if something had been different: what the chances of survival were at what speed, at what angle, and with what car. I enjoy his soft, raspy bass voice. For a time, I come to rest entirely in this memory. But then I hear Wolfgang say that a similar accident on the highway, both in a head-on collision and from the side, would have been fatal. This statement tears me out of my sense of security.

Suddenly I remember I am not sitting in the steam sauna with my friend at all, but that I am in acute danger for my life on the highway. I remember that it is my task to survive this accident that has just taken place. With that, my memory dissolves.

The stream of golden and in all colored-sounding pictures floods me. This time I experience the stream as a kind of synesthetic network of tunnels arching through a multi-dimensional space-like space. This reminds me of the dreams of my childhood and gives me a sense of warmth and security. Then these perceptions shatter, and I awaken to the next memory:

I see myself in the refugee shelter, jumping head first against the wall and sliding down the wall with a forward roll over my shoulder blades. At the end of my workday at the refugee shelter, I gave Mohammed, a young man from Syria, private lessons in evolutionary movement meditation and fall school.

Before fleeing, Mohammed was in a sports school specializing in floor gymnastics and was enthusiastic about parkour training. He had long wanted me to show him how I combined martial arts, movement arts, and meditation. One lesson turned into two, and as the third lesson dawned, we dared the craziest stunts and flying rolls.

"When the flow has the right speed and angle, you can use the resistance of the floor and wall to catapult you further without hurting yourself. Then the resistance becomes a tool for your movement - just as an object becomes useful because it opposes your movements. Objects are tangible clues to our own behavior. If you throw a stone at the water with the right momentum, you can even make stones jump over a lake!" I hear myself say.

As I watch us fly through the air and listen to what I have to say, the saving thought comes to me, "If I yank the wheel around at the last moment, can I manage a flying roll over the concrete barrier?"

No sooner have I finished this thought than I find myself behind the wheel of my car again, just in time to put my thought into action. Literally, at the last moment before impact, I yank the steering wheel around, and the rear end breaks free. The right front tire of my car hits the concrete barrier like a grenade at first. I lose consciousness in the process.

The force of the impact breaks the axle connecting the two front tires and tears a large piece out of the metal rim of the front tire in addition to part of the tire.

Fortunately, the accident report made it into the newspaper as the most spectacular winter accident, allowing me to describe how the accident happened while I was unconscious.

The impact jerks the car's rear into the air, and the combination of momentum and spin sends the car flying over the concrete barrier in a screwed somersault.

At the highest point of this flight arc, I regain consciousness for a moment just as my car begins its descent. Everything inside me screams out: I don't want to die. This must not happen...Then my consciousness darkens, and I pass out again.

Strangely enough, during this fainting, I feel my life is connected with all life on this earth. I see countless communicating crystals shining and flashing in different colors. Everywhere it sparkles and flashes as if this earth's life would also fight for its survival against the final darkening.

In the meantime, in reality, according to the newspaper report, my car hit the breakdown lane top first and then slid on for a few more meters across the concrete floor. Although most of the roof was crushed in the process, the roof over the driver's seat was miraculously spared.

When I regain consciousness after about twenty minutes, everything is droning and glowing so intensely that I can't see anything except glaring outlines. Now I scream. The first clear impression I perceive is of crashing face-first into a concrete wall. My car had already been lying on its roof for a while, and my supposed forward movement was only a sensory illusion caused by my concussion.

Slowly my senses calm down. I see myself hanging upside down in my car with my seat belt fastened. What I had first thought was a concrete wall was the concrete floor of the breakdown lane.

The car's windshield had stopped, not even ten centimeters in front of my face due to the concrete floor of the railroad strip being full of cracks and heavily dented.

To ensure I'm not hallucinating, I move my head forward and press my face nose-first against the windshield. I feel the ice and cold of the concrete on my face.

"If someone hits me in the back now, all that will be left of my head is mush," is my first thought when I can think again. "But what if I have internal injuries and move, then I could die from a careless movement alone!" is my second thought. "Be that as it may, after all, I've been through, I don't want to die because someone can't keep enough distance and drives into the back of my car again.

I decided to check my integrity against the basic patterns of evolutionary motion. Every atom, even a healthy one, can swing vertically, laterally, and transversally. And that is what I am trying to do with the micro-movements of the spine. My body seems to be doing well. I dare to do a handstand with my legs propped up on the car's roof so I can release my seatbelt with one hand. To the left above me, the window is just wide enough for me to squirm through. Fortunately, the impact knocked almost all the glass out of the window frame. I screw my way through, legs first, scratching myself only slightly bloody. Someone is already reaching out to me as I pull my upper body through the broken window. I hear a fearful voice: "Don't move! You could die!"

I grab the hand extended to me to pull myself out of the car until I lie on the snow-covered ice floor. I roll across the ground and stand up. Then it gets tranquil inside me. And I look out at the drifting snow, illuminated by the neon lights of the highway.

I look up at the sky and see the stars shining in the darkness of the night. It’s stunning to be alive.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: 04.01.2016

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident Life threatening event, but not clinical death I was about to crush into block of conrete

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal as described in the documentation of the experience

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? as described in the documentation of the experience

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning as described in the documentation of the experience

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. equal

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. equal

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes as described in the documentation of the experience

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes as described in the documentation of the experience

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes as described in the documentation of the experience

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm As in described in the experience

What emotions did you feel during the experience? awe, curiosity, panic

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? I remembered many past events as described in the documentation of the experience

Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future As in described in the experience

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes I developed a movement meditation praxis, which holds the state of bliss and freedom I have experienced. I did apply it in a medical center afterwards and in an neurodiversity training for autists and non-autists I currently develop. It became a mission to practice, teach and educate about how to navigate the diversity of different modes of functioning of the brain.

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes More than ever I want to live life my way, away of the absurdities of society.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes As in described in the experience

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? Yes As in described in the experience

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife?

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Yes As in described in the experience

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes As in described in the experience

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I have retreated from the world.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes as described in the documentation of the experience

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The whole experience was meaningful to me. I gave me a model of how life works.

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes I shared it in process of writing it down to find the best words.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I knew the exist. I had some vague knowledge.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real I was busy to busy with my brain concussion and the madness after the accident and it took me a while to realize what I had experienced.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I am glad that it helped me to find a way back into living science. In my view my NDE caused a stated of functional hyper-connectivity in the brain, modulating my 2A-Serotonin receptor to warp my time-space-experience. All elements of my experience match the seven categories of mystical experiences by W.T.Stace (1960). The NDE experiences also fits with the history of mystical experiences. While the accident still has a negative impact on my life health-wise, it helps me to understand nature of nervous system, science and reality better.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes There are strong similarities to lucid mystical dreams I have had mostly during my childhood. The are also strong similarities to the experience of a psychedelic, which I dared after the migraine became unbearable and normal medication didn t know help. In the integration sessions I took and at the conference I participated to educate myself afterwards I did find out that lucid dreams/psychedelics and NDE have strong similarities.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? It set a lot of synchronicities in action.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? How was experience of time and space during and after your NDE?