Portia Y NDE

Experience Description

It was during a snow storm with freezing temperatures. I apparently lost control due to ice on the road, and crashed head on with a tractor trailer. I do not remember the collision.

I only remember being in a dark room, lying on a couch with my head on my mother's lap. My mother had passed 1 to 2 years prior, and she was killed in a car accident close to the same location of mine. My mother was caressing my forehead. I felt an indescribable sense of peace and love. I said to her that it is warm here, and I feel so much love. She told me that I had to go back, that I have more to do. I told her that I did not want to go back, and I like it here. I told my mom that I did not want to go back. I begged to stay with her.

I tried to argue and I woke up to paramedic using the 'Jaws of Life.' I asked the paramedic, 'Where is my mom?'

The paramedic told me I had an accident, and my head hit the rearview mirror. The paramedic said thank God the stem did not go through your head.

I lost consciousness again.

I do not know how I did not die in the accident. My car was crushed. Further, how my forehead was not impaled by the rearview mirror.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 1995

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident Other car accident, and lost consciousness I had a head on collision with a tractor trailer.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal I was severely depressed and had a lot of anxiety. I actually suffered a TBI from another car accident 2 years prior. Also, I had PTSD from that accident, and my mother's death.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? I am not sure, but I felt alert and emotionally regulated with my mom. I really felt peaceful, no anxiety or depression.

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? No

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. My vision was clear, but I didn't notice a difference. I no longer had double vision.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I really did not hear anything. My mom talked to me telepathically.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My deceased mother

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Bliss, peace, contentment

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Happiness

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt no longer in conflict with nature

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will My mom told me that I have to go back because I have more to do.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated spiritual

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What is your religion now? Other faiths- New age I am spiritual.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience no comment

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I am not really afraid of death now, but being older now and having a daughter, I am afraid of leaving her.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes I was with my mom, who was already dead.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience?

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Uncertain I became nicer and more compassionate.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I am still not able to explain the peace, calm, and the lack concern for my living.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience no comment

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? no comment

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes shortly after only with close friends. I don't think they believed me.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain I heard about white light and a tunnel, but I did not experience any of that.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real It was real, clear and unforgettable.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real I know what I experienced.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? My life and personality didn't really change until I was older and more mature. I was a professor but have changed my career 4 years ago. I am a mental health therapist now.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? no comment