Souma S Possible NDE

Experience Description

I had a C-section in October 2019. Before my operation, I had developed severe cough and flu-like symptoms. My gynecologist started me on antibiotics five days before the scheduled surgery to help me through with it. However, it didn't make much difference in my condition as unbeknownst to me or my doctors, I was suffering from asthma.

On the morning of the 22nd, my daughter was born through localized spinal anesthesia.

Afterwards, however, I started suffering from severe cough bouts. It was particularly painful due to the fresh surgical incision. The medical team amped up the antibiotics to no avail. The next day was also spent struggling with pain and congested breathing. Whenever I would cough, I would feel as if my raw flesh was being dragged across a sharp-pointed fence. The sheer pain made me want to stop breathing, just to avoid coughing. On the night of 23rd, around 1:15- 1:30 am, I started coughing really bad. The pain was damning and I slowed down my breathing to almost negligible. My husband had gone home to take care of my elder daughter but my mother-in-law was around. A nurse came in to administer my medicines as well. Another coughing bout came and I could feel my will to stop breathing. I think I almost did. I could feel my eyes just staring ahead and not closing.

It was then that I felt a surreal turn-around. It seemed as if I don't even remember that I was in pain. There was a sense of extreme joy, peace, bliss, and contentment all meshed together in one beautiful feeling. I felt totally at peace and submerged in this beautiful feeling. Then I heard a voice, not physically through my senses, but in my head. My mother tongue is Urdu but when I talk with myself, I generally talk in English. The voice said in English, 'It is OK. You can let go.'

I had no further query but as if unconsciously in response to it and still submerged in the feeling of extreme peace, I looked at my newborn daughter's cot that was at the foot of my bed. I saw four to five shadow-like entities standing around it. I got the knowledge that they were there to guard and protect her and that it really is OK for me to let go.

Around that time, the nurse hit me really hard on my back to help me start breathing again. I took a breath and the pain returned. The euphoria however was still there.

Later on the next day, I was finally diagnosed with ill-treated asthma. My lungs were fully congested and steroidal treatment was administered to get me in better shape.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: October 2019

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Uncertain Childbirth Illness, trauma or other condition not considered life threatening. I could not breath. There was no measured assessment of this trauma being life threatening or not.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

Did you feel separated from your body? No.I lost awareness of my body

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? Normal consciousness and alertness. Normal consciousness but with euphoric bliss and extreme peace.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Not applicable

Were your thoughts speeded up? No

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. Timelessness was there

Were your senses More vivid than usual? No

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Not applicable

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Not applicable

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? No

Did you see an unearthly light? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Bliss

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? Incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? No

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Muslim I was deeply spiritual and a liberal religious person. I was a born Shia Muslim but I had also carefully and consciously rationalized my religion for myself. I always believed in the essence of divinity as more important than only ritualistic following of a belief set.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No. I don't believe in ritual but essence. Ritual has its uses but I understand its place now. I believe in love, in inclusion, in non-judgment and in forgiveness.

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Religious unaffiliated Deeply spiritual but not religious. I have been able to see how our initial upbringing, the value sets we inherit from our environment and various social constructs about ethnicity, faith etc. have imprisoned our thought. I am still finding myself but I feel liberated in my journey. I believe in one God, benevolent, all-wise, in and of everything. I believe in love being the supreme purpose in life and that we should live joyfully, never hurting ourselves or others.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes As I answered earlier, there was no change in my life as a direct result of my experience. However, I think it indirectly allowed me to have an understanding of NDEs that then resulted in large changes in my value sets and life.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin. I heard a voice telling me: it is OK, you can let go.

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? Yes The voice in my head and the beings around my daughter's cot were completely unexpected with respect to my earlier set of beliefs. If I would have been hallucinating, my brain should have comforted me with familiar ideology or familiar objects. I have also had episodes of hallucination in my life, this was nothing like it.

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

During your experience, did you gain information about love? Yes I felt extreme bliss and peace

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? No changes in my life I did not even know about NDEs. I came across the literature of NDEs almost two years later. After researching NDEs, my belief set drastically changed. It created significant issues in my relationships as well. But now I feel much more liberated and open towards life. I had led a life full of spiritual guilt and self-criticism powered by religion's philosophy of avoiding sin, be it big or small. Now I realize how cruelly I can deal myself in trying to better myself. I believe in loving myself and others, in not judging, in not allowing fear and exclusion in life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes I had very painful transition because my family is extremely religious. I left hijab. I used to take it by choice but leaving it marked an external signal of my rift with religion. It took me two years of very painful interactions with my partner to do so. I still struggle with keeping myself and my views in line with social norms because being open about them may create serious repercussions for me. I talk about my views with respect to my experience only with the people I can trust. The reason I chose to not go anonymous was to ensure that the credibility of this account should not be hurt but it's a risk for me.

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? No

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No .

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? The bliss, the peace and the beauty of death

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Directly after the experience, I shared the experience with some people in terms of Islamic spirituality and how death is beautiful. My life is full of personal spiritual anecdotes and this became one of them. Later on, I've talked with a couple of people about it as it being some type of a probable near death experience. I still don't know its exact categorization. In that manner, it was taking in a positive manner generally. It helped people who were struggling with the idea of death. However, there were also cynics. A doctor discarded it as hallucinations.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It was real for me because it was nothing like hallucinations. I had extreme clarity in memory then and even now of what transpired.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Auto-saving can help. It's too long.

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