Terry B NDE

Experience Description

I was rafting with friends when we came upon a logjam. The raft pushed up against the logs. As my friends scrambled up the log pile, the raft flipped backwards and spilling me into the water. Trying to pull myself up, I clung to the up side of the logs. I couldn't do it and was forced to let go. I was sucked under the logjam where I became stuck amongst the logs under water. I could hear my friends screaming my name but couldn't move. I repeatedly tried to pull myself up against the current and through the logs. Realizing there was nothing I could do, I was thinking of my family and how sad they would be, particularly my little brother.

Suddenly, I was floating vertically around a magnificent cone-shaped light. I was drawn towards it and I could see myself moving closer to it. The voice of my grandmother, who had passed over five years earlier, told me to stay out of the light. She was a Catholic, had never told a fib in her life, and I knew she would want me to be safe. I saw her standing on the shore, dressed as she always was. She had on a dress, necklace, and earrings. She was holding the hand of a little boy who was dressed for winter in a coat and cap. I kept wondering who he was. I thought that he was too little to be my brother Andy. Again my grandmother said, ‘Stay out of the light.’ With that, I paddled backwards away from the light. The next thing I knew, about 50-60 yards down river, my friends are shaking me because I ended up across the creek, lying on the shore.

Background Information:

Gender: Male

Date NDE Occurred: May 22, 1987

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Drowning Other: trapped under log jam.

How do you consider the content of your experience? Entirely pleasant

The experience included: Out of body experience

Did you feel separated from your body? No I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? While under the logjam. I felt more aware of things around me; it was as if I was watching.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Faster than usual

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning It seemed as though time stood still.

Were your senses more vivid than usual? More vivid than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. No comparison, as if I had 360 degree vision during the experience.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. I cannot recall a difference.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain As the light was cone-shaped, I do not recall a tunnel.

The experience included: Presence of deceased persons

Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My grandmother and a small boy. I moved back to my hometown in 1988. In 1989, while looking through pictures that my mother had from my grandmother's house, I saw the small boy. He was one of her little brothers who died when he was age 4 or 5. I started to cry. It was the boy in my experience!

The experience included: Darkness

The experience included: Unearthly light

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Indescribable! Beyond magnificent

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Very overwhelmed

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will Only because my grandmother told me to stay out of the light.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What importance did you place on your religious/spiritual life prior to your experience? Not important to me

What was your religion prior to your experience? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No

What importance do you place on your religious/spiritual life after your experience? Slightly important to me

What is your religion now? Unaffiliated- Nothing in particular- Secular unaffiliated

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes That there is more after this life.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? No

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? No

Did you believe in the existence of God prior to your experience? God probably does not exist

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? No

Do you believe in the existence of God after your experience? I am uncertain if God exists

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes I thought that this is what happens when you die and we move on: it is all good.

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

Did you believe in an afterlife prior to your experience? I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Do you believe in an afterlife after your experience? An afterlife definitely exists Yes thatmy dead grandmother was talking to me

Did you fear death prior to your experience? I moderately feared death

Do you fear death after your experience? I do not fear death

Were you fearful living your life prior to your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Were you fearful living your life after your experience? Not fearful in living my earthly life

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant prior to your experience? Are possibly meaningful and significant

Did you believe that our earthly lives are meaningful and significant after your experience? Are not meaningful and significant

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? No

Were you compassionate prior to your experience? Moderately compassionate toward others

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

Were you compassionate after your experience? Not compassionate toward others

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Moderate changes in my life Moderate changes in my life.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No Yes

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes The perception of the light, the adrenalin-type heart racing rush, I get it even now, just thinking about it.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience I am constantly amazed at how accurate this memory is,more vivid than the births of my children and each day I question why i didn't die?

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes A couple weeks later: reactions varied from acceptable to bizarre.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes I had heard about it but didn't think it was possible.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real Hearing my friends calling my name one second and then my grandmother the next.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real As if it happened yesterday, now reading of other people over the years, listening to others and how emotional I get just thinking about it.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No