Valda M STE

Experience Description

I have frequent migraines; sometimes so severe that I just want to die. This particular migraine was so bad that all I could do was lie on bed with arms outstretched crying in pain. At the time, I had been divorced. I didn't have health insurance but my children were covered. I could not afford to go to the doctor.

During this migraine, I experienced a past life. I knew the man was me and it looked like the time period of the very early 1940s.

My body, soul, raised up to the ceiling, then up through the roof to a magnificently unbelievable forest scape. The colors were Matisse-like, bold and non-naturalistic colors. Being above the tree tops, I saw a dark tunnel. Since it seemed welcoming, I entered the tunnel. I was so amazed at the feelings of absolute peace of mind, total relaxation, no weight, and no stress. Certainly, I did not want to go back to my body.

I was suddenly in a very real field of wild grasses. I was a young Italian man enjoying himself as he (me) laid in the beautiful grasses in a very large field. Yes, he was masturbating. I was definitely a man and feeling exactly what a man would experience.

Then, just as suddenly, I was back up in the sky. I had to make a decision as to whether to continue on or go back to my body. I knew I would never want my daughters to find me dead. I have no idea how long I was gone, but I had to get back into my body. I allowed whatever forces there were to take me back. I do not remember any telepathic message or communication. Entering the body is an extreme experience from the perspective of absolute peace and fulfillment to the agony of a migraine headache. My children came home to their mother, once again very ill, but at least I was there for them.

I never told anyone this until I was at least the age of 60 or older. I have never read of anyone not seeing relatives or friends, nor was I greeted by anyone. What I remember was that the freedom from the daily, major stress of everyday life was replaced with something I believe awaits us. Yet, the sexuality aspect to it I have never read about this before. I knew that was me in a past life. But why have that experience? At age 80. I really wish I knew if my experience of not seeing an angel, or anyone else should be of concern to me?

The change it had for me was simple. I try to be more accepting. Although I revered nature before, I do so much more now. All animal life to me is the same as our human life. It's extremely difficult to have the knowledge of how humans treat one another; but yet, even more-so as to what wildlife, our domestic animals go through at the hands of humans. I have a very difficult time with that. Thank you for reading. I feel perhaps that I am destined to be alone when I do reach that nirvana! The one thing I did not feel, was that absolute love people experience. I never felt it here, so perhaps I am unable to do so in my body. I believe my friends, my husband and know my children love me but I cannot feel it.

Background Information:

Gender: Female

Date NDE Occurred: 2016

NDE Elements:

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? No. Illness Other: Severe migraine attack

How do you consider the content of your experience? Both pleasant AND distressing

Did you feel separated from your body? No. I clearly left my body and existed outside it

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal. Such a good question. It was simply more real, real because it's something we are not familiar with on earth.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Upon reaching the highest point in the revelation that there was absolutely no anxiety, worry stress.

Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning. There was no feeling of time, it was mercurial-like.

Were your senses More vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Pain seems to last forever. There is only pain. I heard nothing. Thoughts and experiences were blissfully quiet, absolutely no noise.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Every little noise caused more pain. I am very noise sensitive.

Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes But not through to the brightest light. It was somewhere in the middle it disappeared and that is when I experienced another past life.

Did you see any beings in your experience? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? No

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes I cannot look at bright light. Extreme light sensitivity, more so now than then. But, the light was not bright, just extremely light.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? No

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Peace, release, and weightlessness, floating.

Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness

Did you have a feeling of joy? No

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did scenes from your past come back to you? No

Did scenes from the future come to you? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a definite conscious decision to return to life. My children. There is a slight memory that something or someone asked me if I wanted to return. That only came to mind now. Do not know why.

God, Spiritual and Religion:

What was your religion prior to your experience? Background, fundamentalist protestant. Turned me off to religion. Lean towards believing in the universe as the creator.

Have your religious practices changed since your experience? Yes Only that I have a much stronger association with our work and the universe surrounding us.

What is your religion now? Other or several faiths Buddhist but very strong belief we are all one mind completely unaware of it, and too many complex human problems separating us, keeping us apart.

Did your experience include features consistent with your earthly beliefs? Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience. My past life experience may have tried to show me that I am a hedonist; rather than a higher being allowing me to experience something with more depth to it? I do not know how to be a hedonist so that is contrary to how I see myself.

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes I took important personality characteristics more seriously that had to make me better person.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? No

Did you see deceased or religious spirits? No

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? No

During your experience, did you gain information about premortal existence? Yes I absolutely knew the man was myself in the past. I do not know how I knew, but I did know. I did not get his name, just that I was sure I was in Italy.

During your experience, did you gain information about universal connection or oneness? Yes I have always known we are all one. Universe, our flora, our wildlife, our diversity of peoples are all one, before this experience. The experience heightened my belief.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Uncertain Well, there is definitely a supreme power, one who rules everything. In the universe. I wish I could say I was aware of that during my experience.

Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion:

During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? No

During your experience, did you gain information about the meaning of life? No

During your experience, did you gain information about an afterlife? No

Did you gain information about how to live our lives? No

During your experience, did you gain information about life's difficulties, challenges and hardships? Uncertain Knowing you are going back to the lifelong battle of survival and my life was and is so much better than the masses who are truly suffering. I have begged our universal God to let me come back and become wealthy so as to help those who are in need. Also to please give me the same empathetic nature and love for people as I have for animals.

During your experience, did you gain information about love? No

What life changes occurred in your life after your experience? Large changes in my life More compassionate, try much harder at not being judgmental. Became obsessive about our planet and the fear that we are not acting fast enough and now I have no hope as to its health.

Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? No

After the NDE:

Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I attempted all these years to remember accurately so was concerned that between being in the heavens and so quickly being in another time and place in Italy, in past life.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience as accurately as other life events that occurred around the time of the experience My memory in later years, maybe 4-5 years later, are remembered less accurately as to definitely seeing a gigantic UFO above us when driving. I cannot recall if there were lights on the outside or inside perimeter. I never talked about that either. But know what I saw up close above us. I know I saw it but it has dimmed in memory. The NDE is better recalled.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Uncertain Its very difficult to have but I feel all the inner feelings of those around me. I am not a secure person, so I have to be careful that I am not projecting. Some people are nervous around me as they say I can read their mind but I cannot. I feel their sadness or pressures. Also I feel incredible confidence in some people. However, it is pretty easy to see the confidence in people or the lack of it.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? I was taught by my mother that I would go to hell. She hated my artwork and said it was of the devil. As crazy as that sounds, it has always haunted me. I lost my singing voice because I was not singing for the Lord. My experience gave me hope that I can rise and experience the wonderfulness that our Creator can provide. It gave me hope!

Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes A very long time. Twenty years? I think? I do not care anymore who I tell it to as it's interesting that no one takes it seriously except my daughters.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real. It was even for the change in atmosphere during it, too clearly defined. I have had hallucinations from illness or fever. This is very different. I wish I could force them. They are simply another dimension.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real Because I experienced it and the fact everyone else does not, except for those out there who have shared them which helped me bring it about in the open. I did not think I was crazy. I knew I had something occur that was very real.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? No

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? None of my friends or relatives seem to have experienced this. Only people I read of on the internet.

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience? Perhaps clarify more strongly that there are no judgements. Also stress that this information is guarded and not open to the public domain.